


Side Effects

by nyamgi



Category: Stray Kids (Band)
Genre: Addiction, Angst, Boys In Love, Boys' Love, ChanLix, Chansung - Freeform, Depression, Drug Abuse, Drug Addiction, Drug Dealing, Drug Use, Drug Withdrawal, Drugs, Falling In Love, First Love, Fluff and Angst, Friendship/Love, Hardcore, Hyunbin - Freeform, Implied/Referenced Drug Use, Intense, Jealous Lee Felix (Stray Kids), Light Angst, Love, Love Confessions, Love/Hate, M/M, Mental Breakdown, Mild Smut, Panic Attacks, Possible Character Death, References to Depression, Sad, Softcore Porn, True Love, changjin - Freeform, minsung - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-12-06
Updated: 2020-04-15
Packaged: 2021-02-26 05:54:22
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 11
Words: 28,706
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21698812
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nyamgi/pseuds/nyamgi
Summary: A story of love, drugs, and sadness.Jisung bites his lip, "Ah, I'm still dressed sadly. Come fix that, please,"Jisung's revealed his feelings for Chan many many times over the course of knowing each other, and Chan insists he feels the same, but Jisung just can't accept that he feels the same way for him. If Chan felt so similarly, why isn't he with him instead of Felix?This story features minor Chansung, Chanlix, Changjin, etc... The main couple, however, will be Minsung.Enjoy my first Stray Kids story! :)[HIATUS, I'm sorry...]
Relationships: Bang Chan & Lee Felix, Bang Chan/Han Jisung | Han, Bang Chan/Lee Felix, Han Jisung | Han/Lee Minho | Lee Know, Hwang Hyunjin & Seo Changbin, Hwang Hyunjin/Seo Changbin
Comments: 26
Kudos: 116





	1. Chapter One

**Author's Note:**

  * For [bluesunggod](https://archiveofourown.org/users/bluesunggod/gifts), [gundhamronpa](https://archiveofourown.org/users/gundhamronpa/gifts).



Chapter One: Part One

Music is blaring as Jisung is shuffling through the crowd of people dancing and drinking, trying to get to the counter where the alcohol is. Ugh, he has an unbearable headache from all of these loud people in his house. At least, that’s what he assumes is causing it. Surely alcohol will help him loosen up more, it always does. Jisung pours himself a drink of strong whiskey before Chan comes up and wraps one of his arms around Jisung’s waist. Jisung smiles at the familiarity of Chan holding him.

“Already drinking, I see?” Chan asks, clearly already buzzed. His breath smells of the whiskey Jisung had just poured for himself.

“You know I need to have something in me before I can stand being at these things,” Jisung replies, taking his drink in full before slamming the cup back down onto the counter, “Damn that’s good.”

“You know we only keep the good shit here, Jisung,” Chan winks and Jisung knows what he’s actually implying by it. Chan rubs his hand up Jisung’s back, grazing over his taut muscles with his fingers as he speaks, “I just got some more if you wanna come try it. It always helps you loosen up, you know.”

Jisung shifts his eyes to look back at the party happening around them. Chan’s been wanting him to get more out of his shell and talk to people, but Jisung doesn’t do very well around so many people at once. Why does he even go to these parties…? Jisung is starting to think Chan just wants him to find a guy that interests him. He doesn’t see anyone that piques his interest, so he turns back to look at Chan, “Hmm, maybe I’ll just come watch…” Jisung answers, unsure of what Chan has bought from his dealer this time.

Chan smirks as he pours them both another drink before leading Jisung to his room at the end of the hallway. Chan throws these parties almost every weekend it seems like. Jisung is getting tired of always having to come, but he feels something in him that always says to go. He knows deep down it’s because of Chan, but he’ll never miss a chance at a good drink or high. Anything that’ll keep his intrusive thoughts away. Jisung tries to be cautious about the drugs he does take though, having seen first-hand what they can do to you.

Chan unlocks the door to his room, not daring to leave it unlocked and taking the chances of anyone stealing his stash or catching anyone in his own bed at one of his parties.

Chan goes over to his dresser, opening it and pulling out a small Ziploc bag. Jisung watches Chan pull out the plastic bag full of white powder as he goes to sit on Chan’s bed, it squeaking as he sits. He takes a few more drinks of his whiskey before setting his cup down and laying back on the bed to close his eyes for a moment.

Chan comes over to Jisung with the baggie in one hand and moving his other hand to Jisung’s knee, gentling rubbing it, “Hey, it’s only coke. I got it from the same guy as last time,” Chan reassures, thinking Jisung thinks it could be laced with something. He knows how cautious Jisung can be about the drugs they use. Chan starts moving his hand up Jisung’s thigh, “You feeling okay?”

“Mmm…” Jisung hums at Chan’s hand rubbing up against his thigh, opening his eyes to see Chan standing and looking down at him, “I’m good. I just hope this headache goes away soon, I’m sick of feeling like this.”

Jisung can feel his heartstrings tugging as he is looking up at Chan standing semi-between his legs. Why can’t Chan just be with him…?

Chan smiles, lifting his hand from Jisung’s thigh to his hand to pull him up, “Ah, come here, Sung.”

Jisung groans as he sits up, his eyes moving to the little bag Chan is holding, “You promise it’s the same as last time?”

Chan nods, “I promise,” he says, pulling up his nightstand to them before sitting next to Jisung on the bed. The bed makes a slight squeak as he sits, clearing the nightstand before pouring some of the cocaine down onto it. Chan pulls out a piece of paper and makes two little lines of it, one for him and one for Jisung. Chan’s been trying to keep to only one line whenever he does it. He loves the stuff, but he doesn’t want to get addicted.

“Can you get the straws?” Chan asks as he makes the lines for them.

Jisung complies and gets the pack of straws out from under Chan’s bed and pulls out two of them, putting Chan’s on the nightstand by the lines he cut.

Chan smirks widely as he picks up the straw, instantly going in and snorting up his line of cocaine. He inhales deeply afterward and lays back on the bed, “Fuck. He always gets us the good shit, I swear to god, Jisung.”

Jisung snorts his line right after Chan, wiping his nose once he’s completed it. He looks back at Chan laying down and after a few minutes, he begins to feel the effects of the drug taking over. Jisung can feel his headache fading away and a big smile spreads across Jisung’s face, “I always forget how good it feels until we do it again.”

Chan laughs, “We’ve only been doing it for like a month, Jisung,” he grabs ahold of his hand and pulls Jisung down to him.

Jisung’s heart feels like it’s going a mile a minute as he’s pulled onto Chan, “Hey, don’t start something you don’t want to finish…” He warns, his eyes turning sultry as he stares down at Chan’s incredibly handsome face. He lifts his hand to caress Chan’s soft cheek, their skin-to-skin contact feeling almost electric from the increased sensitivity due to the cocaine.

Chan breathes heavily with Jisung on top of him, feeling the effects of his touch immediately, “God, the things you do to me, Jisung,” he lets out in a more husky tone of voice. There’s always been something about Jisung that Chan just can’t seem to stay away from. He tries not to let it affect his relationship, but things have been getting complicated…

Jisung instantly connects their lips, this being a comfortable and common position for the two. Chan’s been seeing Felix for a few months, but Chan insists to Jisung it’s nothing serious.

Whenever Chan and Jisung drink or do drugs together, things always tend to end up like this. They’re all over each other. They don’t know why they always seem to come back to each other. Jisung can’t help his incredible sense of loneliness when he’s without Chan. Chan is Jisung’s only friend that seems to actually care about him. He’s the only one he’s been with in such an intimate way and it’s been like that ever since high school. Chan tries to get Jisung out of his shell and to try and meet new people, but Jisung never finds anyone interesting enough. Everyone he sees at these parties is always the same.

Jisung only feels a sense of wanting when he’s with Chan. Chan brings out the best in him, Jisung has wired himself to think. He’s the only person that’s ever stuck around him so long, after all. Chan has helped Jisung through a lot in his life, and continues to help him even now that they’re older.

Chan grabs the back of Jisung’s head, entangling his fingers within Jisung’s hair as their kisses turn into a rough make out session. Their tongues fighting for dominance until Chan ultimately takes over, flipping Jisung onto his back on the bed so now he’s the one hovering over him.

“Ch-Chan…” Jisung pants when their kiss breaks at the sudden switch of position.

“Is something wrong, Jisung?” Chan asks, genuinely caring about Jisung’s well-being. He doesn’t want to hurt him or do anything he doesn’t want to do.

“Ah… Nothing, I just… I love being with you,” Jisung’s heart is pounding as he stares up at the boy on top of him. Jisung’s revealed his feelings for Chan many many times over the course of knowing each other, and Chan insists he feels the same, but Jisung just can’t accept that he feels the same way for him. If Chan felt so similarly, why isn’t he with him instead of Felix?

“You know I love being with you too, Jisung,” Chan whispers to him, leaning back down to gently kiss all over Jisung’s neck, not leaving any marks on him. He brings his kisses up to eventually end on Jisung’s lips, going back to passionately kissing him. Chan’s heart jumps when he feels Jisung’s hips try to grind up onto his.

Jisung can’t control his body as he pulls Chan down further onto him, needing to feel his every touch. His body floods with tingles as he runs his hands up under Chan’s shirt, feeling his tight back muscles contracting against Jisung’s gentle touch. Their lips part to take heavy breaths, Jisung instantly nuzzling his face into Chan’s neck, sucking and nibbling all over it.

“Jisung, you can’t… Mmm,” Chan tries to tell Jisung, not wanting him to leave any marks on his skin, but he can’t help but let out a groan.

Jisung moves one of his hands up to hold the back of Chan’s head firmly, “Ah, why not? You used to love when I would mark you…” He says through panting breaths, pressing their foreheads together. Every touch sends sparks through Jisung, wanting more and more for Chan to touch him back the same way.

Chan puts his hands on either side of Jisung, holding himself up above him, “I-” Chan tries to start, but Jisung kisses him again. Chan feels a pang within him, knowing he can’t tell Jisung that him and Felix have started to get more serious about each other. Felix has asked Chan to try and stay away from Jisung, but he just can’t do it so easily. He has this feeling deep inside of him that yearns for Jisung.

They hear the door to Chan’s room start to squeak open, and Chan breaks their kiss, “Dammit, I forgot to lock the damn door behind us…” His words trail off as he turns to look at who came in, seeing that it’s Felix.

Felix’s eyes begin to well up with tears as he looks at the scene happening in front of him, “Chan, I-...” He barely gets out, his eyes unable to look away from Chan being on top of Jisung. They were clearly kissing before Felix entered.

“Baby, it’s not what it looks like,” Chan says, getting off from Jisung, hitting his leg against the nightstand as he gets up. He winces, holding back from cursing.

Jisung gently lifts his hand to Chan’s shoulder, “Are you-” Chan tugs his arm away from Jisung’s touch.

“Don’t.” He warns, clearly annoyed, as he stands up from the bed.

“You told me you would try to stay away from him!” Felix whines, seeing the nightstand where Chan hit his leg and the straws, “A-And you’re doing coke again?” Felix turns his head away from him and starts walking away. Chan had told Felix he was going to try and quit doing drugs, at least the hard stuff. Chan would try and tell Felix that cocaine wasn’t as hard as he thinks it is.

Chan sees Felix leave the room and he instantly goes after him, leaving Jisung on the bed alone.

Jisung watches as Chan leaves him, sitting up and staring down at the nightstand. Didn’t Chan tell him that he and Felix weren’t very serious…? Why did Felix react that way? Jisung sighs, knowing he would be upset if he ever caught him and Felix together like they just were. He’s not even in a relationship with him and he knows. Jisung slams his fist down onto the nightstand, “Fuck,” he curses.

Jisung can feel tears starting to come to the surface, but he tries his best to keep them down. He sees the baggie still on the nightstand with both of their straws and he rubs his head, wanting to do another line. Jisung feels his hand shaking as he picks up the baggie, pouring out a little hill of the white powder. He messily straightens it out into a line with the edge of the plastic bag before he snorts up the entire line. He feels an insane rush, feeling his sadness fading away and being replaced with enhanced happiness.

Meanwhile…

Chan is chasing after Felix, catching up to him and he grabs hold of his shoulder, spinning him around to look at him, “Felix… Please-”

Felix shifts his eyes away from his boyfriend staring at him, unable to look at him right now, “You told me that you would stop all this, Chan. How can I trust your word when I catch you blatantly going against it?” He asks, needing answers.

“I just got caught up in the moment… The-” Chan hesitates for a moment, but he knows Felix saw it on the nightstand, “The coke makes me do things I wouldn’t normally do… I’m sorry,” He tries to hold Felix’s cheek, wanting him to face him.

Felix’s eyes are filled with pain as he finally looks at Chan, seeing his completely dilated pupils, “That’s why you said you were trying to stop doing it,” He sighs, “Did Jisung make you do that with him?” Felix asks, wanting to know who was the one that initiated taking the drugs.

Chan feels conflicted as Felix asks him this, not knowing what Felix would do if he knew that it was Chan who initiated the entire thing. He doesn’t know what to say.

“You did it, didn’t you?” Felix asks, figuring it out from Chan’s silence. This fact hurts him deeply, gritting his teeth, “Why, Chan? We just decided to become more serious,” A tear streams down Felix’s cheek. It hurting him even deeper when he sees the reddish marks around Chan’s neck. Felix knows those marks weren’t from him.

“I’m sorry, Felix… I know you shouldn’t, but I’m begging you to forgive me,” Chan pleads, wiping Felix’s face before placing a soft kiss on his cheek.

Felix allows the kiss, it making him and his heart feel the most confusion he’s ever felt. What should he do?

“Will you please try to stay away from Jisung…?” Felix asks as he forces himself to look away from the hickies, the cheating hurting him more in the moment than the drugs. Felix knows Chan has been doing drugs for a while and will talk to him about that more later. He needs an answer on this Jisung situation right now. He wants Chan to be his and his only. That is what being in a relationship with someone is, after all.

Chan knows how Jisung gets when he’s alone and that worries him. He doesn't want to have to stop being around him. To be honest, he doesn’t know what Jisung would do without him and that scares him badly. It has been a while since his last breakdown, and he hasn’t had one coming to the parties Chan’s held this month. Maybe it’s time for Jisung to try and open up to others for once though, Chan thinks, wanting to justify what he’s about to agree to.

“I will try, Felix. I promise you,” Chan says, stroking Felix’s cheek, hoping his reply sounds as genuine as he means it to be.

Felix melts into Chan’s hands, his words making a smile spread across his face. It warms Felix’s heart to hear that Chan is willing to try and make things work between them, but he can’t get rid of the little part of him telling him how harmful their relationship is. Jisung always seems so clingy and needy to Chan, at least that’s how Felix has seen it.

“Thank you, my love…” Felix whispers to him before giving him a loving kiss on the lips. This is one of the reasons they thought they should make their relationship more exclusive. They were talking to each other one night and Felix had revealed how deeply he’s fallen for Chan. Chan reciprocated Felix’s feelings, having been afraid of them for a long time. Chan always worried about Jisung and that’s why he never told Felix about his true feelings first.

End of Chapter One: Part One

\----------------

I wrote the entirety of chapter one and it turned out to be like 8,000 words... So I'm splitting it into parts ;) There will be three parts to chapter one!

I hope you enjoy my first Stray Kids fic!

This will be a bit more intense and hardcore compared to the other fics I've written on here so far!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you like my stories, feel free to follow me on twitter @pinearah :)


	2. Chapter Two

Chapter One: Part Two

Jisung goes back out into the party, feeling much more into it after taking that second line. He's actually dancing and laughing with everyone around him, taking drinks of everything. Jisung is never this much of a partier when he's not high, extremely far from it actually. What is this cocaine doing to him? He moves to the more dance-heavy section of the party, feeling the need to let his energy out by dancing.

Jisung begins to roll his body to the loud music playing throughout the house. He spots a boy further into the crowd that's dancing quite similarly to him and he's interested to see him closer, so he makes his way to the stranger. He starts dancing closely to the mysterious dark-haired boy, hoping he goes with him and surprisingly, the boy does.

The dark-haired boy moves closer to Jisung, showing him a big smile as they start to dance with each other, "What's your name, stranger?"

Jisung puts an arm on the boy's shoulder, moving his body in sync with his, "Jisung," he smiles, running his other hand down the stranger's chest, feeling his sculpted abs through his white shirt.

"Well, Jisung..." He allows them to get even closer, their chests grazing each other with every movement. His hand snaking around to hold onto the back of Jisung's neck as he replies, "I'm Minho."

Jisung bites his lip as Minho grabs the back of Jisung's neck, rolling his hips against his leg, "Maybe we could," Jisung nuzzles his head close to Minho's ear, "Go somewhere else?" He whispers.

Minho smirks as he feels Jisung's hot breath against his ear and neck, it giving him goosebumps all over his body, "Mmm, where have you been all my life?"

Minho takes ahold of Jisung's hands, Jisung feeling the intense sensitivity of his touch instantly. Jisung squeezes Minho's hands as he leads him out of the crowd around them, giggling as he takes him down the hallway. Minho can't stop focusing on the man leading him down the hall. Minho blames his inability to focus on the heavy drinking he'd done just before going to dance. Why on earth did he drink so much tonight? He wouldn't have if he knew this was going to happen.

Jisung leads them into the room at the end of the hall, Chan's room, the door still being open from when Jisung left. Jisung goes in first and Minho closes the door behind them, locking it before tugging on Jisung's hand, pulling him back towards his body. He missed the way their chests would touch when they were dancing. Minho wraps his arms around Jisung's neck, kissing him hard.

Jisung's eyes widen by the sudden tug on his arm, but then he's brought into the heavy kiss Minho has planted on him. Jisung feels his body heat up like a fire as he kisses Minho back, moving his hands up under Minho's shirt to feel his skin against his palms.

Their lips move quickly against one another, not having to fight for dominance as they both settle into their roles instantly. Jisung allowing Minho to take control over his mouth, loving the way he kisses him so intimately. He's always wanted Chan to kiss him like this. He's always wanted Chan to love him.

Jisung tries to get Chan out of his head as he's kissing Minho, Minho leading them slowly to the bed in the room. Jisung falls back onto the bed, it squeaks. The squeaking makes Minho laugh, "We might end up breaking this rickety bed tonight, Jisung," he whispers to him, going to nibble on his earlobe.

Jisung breathes heavily as he lays on the bed, looking up at Minho when he comes back up, "They'll just have to get a new one then," Jisung grips the back of Minho's shirt, pulling it up.

Minho smirks, sitting up and allowing Jisung to remove his shirt, "I guess you're right."

Jisung rubs his hands over Minho's now bare chest, admiring his well-sculpted abs. Maybe he really is a dancer, Jisung thinks. Minho's body is so fit. Jisung begins to wonder if Minho will have the same stamina or flexibility a dancer has too.

Minho tugs at Jisung's jeans, unbuttoning and unzipping them before he pulls them down, tossing them onto the floor. While Minho was sloppily pulling of Jisung's jeans, Jisung removed his shirt, now holding himself up by his elbows on the bed.

Minho looks down at the almost-naked man in front of him and feels his own pants tightening up around the crotch, his cock hardening completely. Jisung smirks as he sees Minho's member becomes visible through his jeans, the outline looking quite impressive. Jisung puts his fingers through the belt loops of Minho's jeans as he pulls him down onto him.

Minho falls onto Jisung, falling into an intense kiss that Jisung leads. Minho tries to wiggle out of his own pants as they kiss. Jisung moves his hands down to help Minho, allowing him to focus more on their passionate kiss. Jisung pushes Minho's jeans down fully, allowing for Minho to kick them off onto the floor where the rest of their clothes lay.

Jisung can feel his high starting to wear off as Minho starts kissing down his chest, his hands massaging up his chest while he makes his way down. Minho's hands reach Jisung's nipples and gently massage them as his mouth gets to the top of Jisung's briefs.

Jisung tries to enjoy himself, but he can't fight off his heart beating noticeably faster and it's not from Minho. Jisung feels this intense fear rising inside of him and he starts to pant, his eyebrows going into a furrow. This can't be happening right now, Jisung thinks. He hasn't had one in a while, he was hoping they had gone away for good.

"Mmm, I didn't think you'd be enjoying it this much, Jisung. I've barely started..." Minho says, smiling widely before he looks up at Jisung and sees he looks like he's about to have some sort of mental breakdown and his smile instantly drops, "Jisung, are you okay?" He stops what he's doing and crawls back up to him, putting the back of his hand to Jisung's forehead, feeling that he's burning up. Could he be sick?

Jisung shakes his head, his eyes watering up, "C-Can you leave?" Jisung asks, not wanting Minho to have to deal with or see this happen. This can't be happening, this can't be happening. His fear is taking over his body and he doesn't understand why other than his high wearing off and everything setting in. He never understands why they happen.

Minho shakes his head, "I can't just leave you alone here, Jisung... You're basically naked and you look like you're about to cry. I don't mind staying here with you, it's okay," Minho tries to reassure Jisung, getting up and going to the closet in the room looking for a blanket or two to wrap around Jisung. He finds a large throw and brings it over to the bed, laying it next to Jisung in case he needs it.

Jisung starts to cry, all of the stress inside of him rising to the surface from his high wearing off and he just can't take it.

"Do you know what's wrong, Jisung?' Minho asks, wanting to try to help him if he's able to. Minho places a hand onto Jisung's leg, wanting Jisung to know that he's safe.

Jisung shakes his head. He really doesn't know what's wrong, but he can't get over this overwhelming feeling of dread. He looks and sees the throw that Minho got for him and he wraps it around himself, trying to hide his face from Minho. He's never had a breakdown like this around anyone other than Chan.

Minho holds onto Jisung, letting him lay against him. Maybe it's the drinks he's had, but he feels this connection with Jisung. He's only known him for an hour or two, but he just feels something. Damn, he really must be drunk, Minho thinks to himself.

Jisung is quietly sobbing against Minho's chest, wanting to calm down, but he just can't. This is how it always goes for him. He will eventually calm down, but he knows it won't be for a while. He wishes Chan were here, but he feels a bit of happiness knowing Minho hasn't left him yet. Maybe he's just too drunk. Hell, he's too drunk himself. All that whiskey he drank definitely isn't helping with his intense emotions from coming off of his high. He wants more cocaine.

Minho looks around the room, seeing that it's nicely kept. The nightstand being in front of the bed instead of where a nightstand normally sits is odd, but Minho wouldn't know why. He sees the straws sitting on top of it and suspects whoever was here was probably doing something like cocaine. His head is spinning, having to lay back on the bed, bringing Jisung with him so he can hold him.

"We can lay down like this, right Jisung?" Minho whispers to him, still worried about what he's going through. Minho had to lay down, all those drinks are finally catching up with him and if he doesn't lay down, he thinks he'll throw up.

Jisung nods, his body falling perfectly in place with Minho's as the smaller spoon. Jisung's crying eventually calms down to just soft sniffles, still breathing heavily. Minho has been gently stroking Jisung's hair, hoping that it helps in calming him down.

"G-God, I need something to get me high again... I can't stand feeling like this," Jisung says quietly, turning over so he can look up at Minho. When he looks at Minho, he sees that he's already fallen asleep. Jisung, still feeling tipsy, sits up, moving Minho's arm from being around him.

He can feel his headache coming back, so he glances towards the nightstand still in the same place with the straws still sitting on it. He stares at it for a few seconds before he inevitably ends up right back in front of it, taking the baggie out from the nightstand where he'd stored it when he left the room last time. God, he really needs another line. It always makes his headaches go away, even if for only a little bit.

Jisung shakily starts pouring more of the white powder onto the nightstand when he hears the doorknob jiggle. Minho must've locked the door when they came in here earlier, Jisung thinks to himself.

It continues to jiggle, so Jisung gets up, keeping the blanket wrapped tightly around him as he goes to open the door.

"What the hell do you want?" Jisung asks immediately, annoyed from his headache, his eyes still puffy and his face red as he looks at who was so eager to open the door.

Chan stares back at him with Felix standing behind him, Chan's eyes going wide as he looks at Jisung's face, clearly seeing he's been crying. His worry for Jisung is uncontrollable, concerned that Jisung had one of his breakdowns. Chan knows how common they can be for Jisung. But he hasn't had one in so long... He feels a pang in his heart, realizing it's been the first one in a while he hasn't been there for him to help him through it.

Chan then notices his blanket wrapped around Jisung, looking at his bare legs coming down from under it. Is he... naked?

"Why are you in here, Jisung?" Felix asks from behind Chan, holding onto his arm. How protective of him, Jisung thinks.

Jisung turns his head, "It's just a room. It was unlocked anyway," He answers, knowing very well he's the reason it was unlocked and that he really shouldn't have brought Minho into this room, but he wasn't all there at the time. Maybe he was just mad at Chan. Maybe Jisung just wanted someone to take his mind off of him. Chan leaving him for Felix that night made him realize that maybe things between the two won't be the same anymore.

Chan leans in, looking further into the room to see a half-naked man lying on his bed asleep, "Who in the hell is that, Jisung?" He asks, not in a particularly jealous tone like Jisung was looking for, but more of an actual anger-filled question. This is the whole reason Chan keeps his door locked during parties.

"Minho. I met him tonight. Isn't that what you wanted me to do? Find someone? Find someone so that you don't have to deal with me anymore?" Jisung asks Chan, his anger rising up within him from the mix of his pounding headache and his feelings for Chan still simmering at the front of his mind.

"Yeah, Jisung, sure whatever," Chan scoffs, becoming annoyed by Jisung's words.

"Can you just leave?" Felix asks as he takes a step forward, anger prominent in his voice. He is sick of Jisung trying to make Chan feel bad for not being with him. Chan is with him, not Jisung. Felix doesn't like how jealous and territorial he's being right now, but he needs to be more assertive with what he wants and needs to show Chan he's serious about the two of them being in a committed relationship.

Jisung takes a deep breath, glancing back at Minho still sleeping on the bed and he turns back to Chan and Felix in front of him, "Yeah, I can leave, but give me a second. Okay?" Jisung shuts the door on them, walking back to the bed to shake Minho awake.

Minho groans loudly as he rolls over, "Mmm, just a few more minutes please," he says, stretching his entire body out. Jisung looks away when he sees the way his body stretches, not wanting to think about the incredibly sexy man lying in front of him right now.

"We have to leave," Jisung says firmly, not wanting to be here any longer than he has to. While Minho groggily sits up and rubs his eyes, Jisung gets dressed back into the clothes he was wearing.

"Ugh, I can't go home this messed up," Minho complains, still having a lot of alcohol in his system and he's not about to drive under the influence.

"There are other rooms you'll be able to crash in, okay?" Jisung sighs, leaning over by the bed when he sees the little baggie of cocaine fell on the floor. It's a good thing he sealed it after using it last. He shoves it in his front pocket. Surely Chan won't miss it too badly, Jisung thinks as he smirks.

Minho looks up at Jisung with soft eyes, sliding off of the bed and drunkenly trying to get his pants back on, "You're leaving, I take it?"

Jisung hums, trying not to look at Minho as he struggles to get his jeans on.

Minho finally gets them up and he goes over to Jisung, smiling at him as he puts his hand under Jisung's chin to lift his face up to look at him, "You sure you want to leave?" Minho teases, still feeling this thing that draws him to Jisung.

Jisung shifts his eyes, knowing they're still puffy from crying so hard and he dislikes Minho seeing that, "We have to leave, Minho. I mean it."

Minho brings his head down to Jisung's, Jisung able to feel Minho's hot breath against his face. They drink the same thing, Jisung thinks when he smells the alcohol on his breath.

"I know we have to leave but are you leaving me?" Minho asks blatantly.

Jisung is a bit shocked to hear Minho even still wants Jisung to stay with him, but he still doesn't like how he just broke down in front of him. It makes him feel uncomfortable. He can't just do that in front of anyone, in fact, he can't do it in front of anyone anymore it seems. Felix is trying hard to get Chan out of Jisung's life. This fact hurts Jisung deeply, realizing he might not have anyone to confide in anymore.

"Are you upset because you cried?" Minho asks another question, letting his chin go. Clearly Jisung doesn't want to stay, but Minho wishes he would, "Everyone needs to have a good cry sometimes, Jisung. It's really okay."

"Not in front of you," Jisung retorts, "Not in front of anyone anymore. I will not let someone see me like that!" His voice raises towards the end, "I didn't even want to sleep with you, okay? I don't sleep with anyone except- Ugh. You saw way too much of me tonight and that's just unacceptable..." Jisung says shakily. The thought of Chan standing outside the door makes him say more hurtful things to Minho. Jisung's head is so messed up right now.

"Listen, I know we just met, but I don't believe it's me you're actually mad at. If you ever want to talk or... uh, anything... you can find me," Minho takes out a piece of paper from his pants pocket.

Does he always keep paper in there?

Minho scribbles down his phone number and stuffs it into Jisung's front pocket, ruffling his hair after, "Maybe you'll think differently after you've calmed down a little more, you know?" Minho grabs his shirt and goes towards the door, opening it to see Chan and Felix still standing there. He chuckles, winking at them, "Good night, fellas."

Jisung feels himself getting worked up once again, his headache still feeling like it's destroying him from the inside out. Fuck, he needs more coke, he thinks to himself as he grabs his head from pain. He can't think straight right now. He can barely even remember what he just said to the boy he brought to bed that night.

Jisung's brow furrows as he heads towards the door, seeing Chan and Felix again is most definitely not helping his headache, "It's all yours," Jisung spits out, leaving the room quickly and heading towards the door leading out of Chan's house.

He just has to get to his car.

Jisung stumbles a bit, going down the driveway as he keeps a lookout for his car. He finally spotted it and let out a sigh of relief, rushing to it and he gets into the driver's seat, slamming the door closed. He lays back against the seat, taking long deep breaths.

Breathe in slowly... hold... breathe out slowly...

Jisung can't handle all of this on him right now. He didn't sleep with that Minho guy, but he can feel that he would've if he hadn't had a sudden panic attack -- at least, that's what he assumed it to be. He doesn't know why it happened... All he can think of is that everything with Chan leaving him, the cocaine leading him to party with everyone and being around so many people just overwhelmed him.

After he's calmed down a bit more, he can't help but laugh a little at himself. He had a panic attack right before he was about to get blown. What a dumbass. Jisung sits up in his car seat. He's still sitting in Chan's driveway, of course. The outside air is so cold it's made ice appear on his windows, so he turns on his car and turns on the heat. Jisung thinks about the last few things Minho said to him. How did he know he wasn't actually mad at him? Was he just guessing?

Minho really stayed with him through his entire breakdown, huh? That stupid drunk, Jisung thinks to himself. He finds himself smiling at the thought, still. Maybe someone else could be like his Chan...

End of Chapter One: Part Two

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you like my stories, feel free to follow me on twitter @pinearah :)


	3. Chapter Three

Chapter One: Part Three

~

Chan and Felix go into the room after Jisung and Minho finally leave.

"Ugh, I can't believe he used your room to do that in, Chan," Felix says, hoping that Chan seeing Jisung with someone doesn't upset him. It shouldn't. Chan is with Felix.

Chan hums, looking at the room for anything out of place. He spots the small pile of cocaine still on the nightstand and it caused his heart to race, "Yeah..." Chan replies, going to stand in front of the nightstand to try and clean it.

"You don't have to hide it, I had already seen the coke," Felix sighed, sitting down on the bed.

Chan feels disappointed in himself, knowing how much Felix wishes he would quit using. Chan sweeps the cocaine off into his hand and he looks for the baggie, not finding it. Fuck. Did Jisung take it? Chan shakes his head angrily, but he gets out another baggie to pour it into. He's not going to let his good blow go to waste.

Chan goes and sits with Felix, his bed squeaking like always. He thinks about what Felix said. Jisung didn't really sleep with Minho, right? He and Felix could hear the two of them talking faintly while waiting and he couldn't tell if what Jisung said meant he did sleep with him or if he didn't.

Chan tries to get Jisung off of his mind, but he can't help but worry about him.

Felix gently puts his hand on Chan's thigh, rubbing it softly, "Hey," Felix says in his smooth voice, it makes Chan look at him, "I want you to know how much I care about you, Chan."

Hearing Felix say that causes a genuine smile to appear on Chan's face, "Do you know how happy you make me feel?" Chan asks.

Felix blushes, "Maybe... But you could show me," he giggles as he climbs onto Chan's lap, wrapping his arms around him while he kisses his neck.

~

Minho walks around the party, looking for an empty room. Who knew it would be so hard to find a room not full of people banging?

Minho groans, eventually settling on just stealing one of the bathrooms. At least there's a lock. Minho goes into the bathroom and locks the door behind him, going to the mirror to see how rough he looks. He doesn't look too bad, but his face does look swollen and drained. He just wants some place to rest.

Minho settles into the bathtub, laughing at himself. He's really come to sleeping in a bathtub, huh? Minho can't be bothered by it. In the morning he will be able to go home, he just has to sober up.

Minho finds it difficult to fall asleep in the hard tub, but he does eventually pass out.

~

The morning comes and Minho wakes up, this groggy feeling overwhelming him, "Dammit," he curses as he tries to sit up, his back cracking.

Minho pulls himself out of the tub, his muscles feel like they've been obliterated from sleeping like that the whole night. He runs his hands through his hair to try and make himself not look like such a mess. At this point, he can't wait to get home and be able to finally lay in his own bed.

He opens the bathroom door, seeing a few people passed out on the floor along with some red solo cups that fell. He has to step over a few people as he makes his way through the house. Minho assumes he woke up pretty earlier considering no one else is up. He makes it to the front door and heads out, looking for his car in the driveway.

Minho crosses his arms over his chest tightly, the cold air hitting him as soon as he steps out of the warm house. He goes down the driveway, knowing he parked somewhere in the middle. While he's on his way to where he thinks he parked his car, he spots someone sleeping in the car that's in front of his. His curious mind gets the better of him and he peeks into the car, his eyes widening when he sees Jisung.

Minho smiles, hoping that Jisung is alright. He guesses he didn't want to drive home messed up either. Minho debates whether or not he should tap on the window of his car. That would be creepy, right? Minho feels conflicted. Hell, who cares if he's creepy, he wants to make sure the guy is alright.

Minho taps on the glass by Jisung's sleeping head, "Hey man, are you good?"

Jisung wakes up suddenly from the tap, it sounding loud against his ear. His sudden movement knocks down a pair of sunglasses from his dash. He sits up after picking the sunglasses up from the floor and setting them back, looking at the window and seeing Minho. What the fuck...?

Jisung squints his eyes at him, "Minho...?" He asks, turning on his car so he can roll down the window. Thank god he didn't fall asleep with his car still running.

"Hey, I just woke up and was about to leave when I seen you here. I, uh, just wanted to make sure you were okay and everything. Last night seemed a bit wild for you," Minho tries to let out a chuckle, but he just makes himself seem awkward. Which wouldn't be wrong, but that's not how he's wanting to come off.

Jisung lets out an actual laugh, finding Minho's awkwardness endearing, "Ahhhhh, so you were worried about me?" Jisung smirks, "Don't worry. I'm okay now, really. The only thing I'm feeling now is a little shook up because someone decided to scare the living hell out of me at—" he looks at the clock, "6:30 in the morning. Like a LUNATIC!"

Minho smiles big at Jisung's playful attitude. He just knew Jisung was in a bad mood last night because of those guys that wanted the room we were in — and the breakdown he had. Minho's eyes go soft when he remembers the way Jisung cried. It reminded him of when his mother would come home some nights and breakdown similarly to how Jisung did. He would always console her and make sure she knew she was okay and everything was alright.

"So maybe I am a lunatic," Minho leans forward, resting his elbows on the opening of the car with his head in his hands, "What does that make you?"

Jisung shakes his head, smiling big as he leans back in his seat, looking at Minho, "I think that would make me a scaredy-cat,"

"Why? Because you jumped so high up in your seat I was surprised your face didn't squash against the ceiling," Minho snorts when he laughs, "That's okay though... I like cats," He winks at Jisung.

Jisung blushes, a smile spreading across his face as Minho's flirty attitude, "Do you?"

"I actually do, though. I have three," Minho feels his body starting to shiver, "Hey, can I come sit with you in there?"

Jisung looks towards the passenger seat of his car, nodding. Minho hurries over to the other side of the car and gets in, smiling at the warmness of the car air. Jisung rolls his window back up once Minho is seated beside him, letting the car get even warmer.

"Thank you, I think my balls were about to freeze off," Minho laughs, laying back on the seat and puts his feet up on the dash.

"Ah, if that were to happen then I guess I would have to warm them up," Jisung rubs his hand up Minho's leg.

Minho puts his hand onto Jisung's, it still cold from being outside so long, but it feels so good feeling that intense heat coming from Jisung's hand. He squeezes his hand in place, happy to be able to relax in the comfortable seat of Jisung's car. It's much better than the hard bathtub Minho slept in all night.

"Sorry I said all that last night, Minho. My head was killing me and seeing..." he pauses for a moment, unsure if he wants to go into his relationship issues with Chan, but he continues, "uh, with me seeing Chan and Felix standing at the door like that just made me more upset, you know?"

Minho looks over at Jisung, still laying back in his seat, "It's alright, Jisung. Like I said, I knew what you said wasn't really directed towards me. You seemed to be going through a lot last night anyway," Minho shows Jisung a comforting smile.

Jisung looks at Minho for a while, taking all of his features in. Last night he was so messed up, he didn't get to actually see how insanely attractive Minho was. Of course, he knew he was handsome, but with his mind finally clear and sober, it's different.

Minho smirks, "What are you looking at, little boy?" He chuckles, lifting his hand to ruffle Jisung's fluffy brown hair. It feels so soft and it immediately poofs up when Minho ruffles it.

Jisung squints his eyes, "Ew, did you just call me little boy?" Jisung sticks his tongue out in playful disgust, hiding his smile.

"I don't know, did I?" Minho asks as he leans over the console between them, pressing his forehead to Jisung's. The tension between the two clearly rising fast.

Jisung's eyes go wide at Minho's sudden movement towards him, feeling his heart beating faster as their faces become centimeters apart. Jisung feels this fire in his heart begins to rise up as he circles an arm around Minho's neck, bringing him down for a deep kiss.

Minho flows into the kiss like it's a natural thing for the two of them to do now, it feels so right to him.

Jisung gently pushes up as they kiss so intimately, their hands travel all over each other's bodies as Jisung pushes Minho back to sitting in his seat, him now being the one leaning over. Jisung climbs over the console and into Minho's lap, straddling him as they kissed heatedly.

Minho wraps his arms around Jisung's body as he climbs on top of him. Oh, he could definitely get used to this. Minho's hands wander under the back of Jisung's shirt, it making Jisung get goosebumps everywhere from Minho's cold hands touching his skin like that.

Jisung parts their lips, going down to Minho's neck and he begins to give it tender kisses. Jisung wonders if Minho would be mad at him if he left marks on his neck. Maybe he would like it...? Jisung softly begins to suckle on Minho's neck, it causing Minho to let out a groan as he leans his head back for Jisung to have easier access, "Mmm, you gonna let everyone know I'm seeing someone?"

Jisung blushes when he hears Minho's sweet voice groaning like that. Maybe he is trying to let people know Minho is now taken. They're not even in a relationship though? Yet, anyway. Jisung smirked to himself as he continues to suck along Minho's neck, even pulling on his shirt to reveal his collarbone so he's able to give attention to every part of Minho that he's able to.

Minho lays back and enjoys the attention his neck is receiving, having always loved the feeling. He sees the windows of Jisung's car beginning to fog up as they continue, Minho roughly rubbing Jisung's back. He gently pulls on his skin, letting him know how much he wants him in this moment.

Jisung never knew the feeling of someone tugging on his back could turn him on so quickly, but hell it's killing him. He finds himself shyly grinding his hips against Minho as he finally comes up from his neck and looked at him with a strong wanting in his gaze, his pupils taking over almost all of his iris.

Minho bites his lip, his eyes glued right on Jisung's when he comes up. He breathes heavily as Jisung starts to grind his hips onto him, feeling his hard cock through his jeans rubbing against his lower stomach. Minho lifts his hips up a bit as Jisung continues, allowing for him to grind against each other easier. Minho doesn't know if they'll actually have sex right now, but the intimacy of it all is a bit overwhelming. He didn't think it would be this hot and heavy. None of his other encounters were ever like this. So sensual, yet so tame.

Jisung pants as the air in the car gets really hot and feels extremely dense. Seeing the wanting in Minho's eyes does something to him internally. God, why does he have to be this hot? And he fucking cares? What kind of gem did Jisung find at that party last night?

Jisung crashes his lips back against Minho's sliding his tongue into his mouth where Minho's meets his and they play with each other for a few seconds before Minho nibbles down onto Jisung's lower lip, giving it a gentle suck afterward.

That morning continues, Jisung and Minho not having sex, but instead connecting with one another in a more intimate way. Minho eventually went back to his car, but not before patting Jisung's front pocket, reminding him that his phone number is still written down on a piece of paper in there.

End of Chapter One: Part Three

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you like my stories, feel free to follow me on twitter @pinearah :)


	4. Chapter Four

Jisung is laying in his bed when the reminder alarm on his phone goes off.

Go to Chan's party 7:00 PM

Jisung groans, knowing he shouldn't go to Chan's party this weekend. He sits up and grabs his phone, turning off the reminder so he doesn't have to see it. He's craving some cocaine though and he knows Chan always supplies it for him. He already snorted all of what he stole from Chan when he left the party last week.

Jisung gets up out of bed, having spent most of the day in it in a restless state. He'll get like this sometimes, life feeling so overwhelming to him that he just spends the whole day in bed. Chan has always been worried for Jisung about that. Jisung doesn't think it's too much to worry about, though.

Jisung goes to his closet and pulls out a shirt, discontent visible on his face when he sees that the shirt he got out is one of Chan's. He reluctantly puts it on, Chan's scent immediately hitting him and Jisung curses at himself, knowing he can't help but love and miss the smell of him. Jisung's cheeks heat up when he inhales the scent of Chan's shirt. God, why is he like this? Jisung shakes his head, wanting to rid himself of these thoughts.

He finishes getting dressed and heads out the door, knowing Changbin is the one that gets Chan the drugs. That's where he's heading tonight.

Jisung gets into his car and drives to Changbin's house. He feels a wave of anxiety pass over him as he steps out of his car, never having been to Changbin's house without Chan. It's always so loud and full of people. He only felt safe and secure because of Chan being by his side. It can't be too bad, right? Besides, he really needs this right now.

Jisung walks up to the front door, already hearing the loud music and people yelling and laughing. He opens the door and goes in, shoving his hands into his pockets uncomfortably as he looks around the party. Changbin's house must be a constant party. This is nothing like Chan's parties, they're much more... intense.

Changbin is sitting on an L-shaped couch in the corner of the room, having Hyunjin basically sitting on top of him he's so close. Jisung keeps his head lowered as he walks over to Changbin, "Hey, man..." Jisung pulls out some money, "Do you think I could get what we usually get?"

Changbin laughs, looking up at Jisung and seeing Chan isn't with him, "Yeah, but where's Chan?" Changbin looks at Hyunjin, who then moves his body a bit so Changbin is able to get into his pocket and he pulls out a little baggie of cocaine. Hyunjin then goes back to nuzzling his face into Changbin's neck, seeming to be kissing it.

"I don't know, probably at his own party," Jisung says as he takes the baggie, shoving it into his pocket after Changbin takes the money.

Changbin smirks, "Ahhhh, did he finally drop you for Felix?" He teases, but it hits Jisung hard considering it is true.

"And what the fuck about it?" He looks around the party, feeling the fear inside of him starting to escalate quickly. He takes a deep breath, holding it for a moment. Chan had taught him how to do that. It always seemed to keep him calmer for longer when he was starting to get worked up like this.

"Hey, man. I'm just fucking with you, but if the shoe fits," Changbin laughs, not knowing Jisung enough to know how much it's hurting him. Changbin was always more of Chan's friend rather than Jisung's friend. He was just Jisung's friend by association.

Jisung's eyes fill with frustration, knowing that the shoe does, in fact, fit. He keeps trying to do the breathing exercises that Chan taught him, and it helps his frustration subside a bit. Jisung keeps his hands in his pockets, "Yeah, well... Thanks for the stuff. I'll be seeing you around more, I think," Jisung ends, not letting his emotions take over his words.

Changbin nods, seeing the conversation is over and he immediately diverts his attention to Hyunjin, rubbing one of his palms against his thigh.

Jisung turns around, not caring to see any of that action, and he goes as quickly as he can through the crowd of the party. He gets bumped by someone when he's pushing through, and this causes Jisung to fall into someone else. The man he hits in the collateral shoves Jisung back angrily, "Get the fuck out of here," he says to Jisung.

Jisung tries to apologize, but the man shoves him back again. Jisung decides it would be best for him to leave as fast as he can before things escalate any further and he walks quickly to his car. He takes a deep breath once he finally gets inside of his car. How is he going to go to that house every weekend to get coke if it's going to be like this?

When Jisung gets home he lays on his bed and gets a book out. A perfect surface, he thinks. Jisung pulls out the small plastic baggie and pours some onto the cover of the book, straightening it out with a piece of paper before he snorts it. He didn't have time to find a straw to make it cleaner. He needed it now.

Jisung lays back on his bed, the effects of the drug taking over and he instantly feels better. An intense feeling of happiness taking over his body, but he recoils at the bright light of his lamp. He turns it off, laying back in his now dark room.

Jisung can finally be free of his headache, he thinks. Was he even having a headache? He can't remember at the moment.

Jisung lays there for a while, enjoying his high, when he sees his phone light up. He grabs it from the nightstand and a piece of paper falls onto his chest. Ugh, why did he lay this on his phone? He picked the paper up and shines his dim phone light onto it, seeing what it is.

Minho's phone number.

Jisung smiles as he remembers Minho from the weekend before. He hadn't contacted Minho at all this past week, knowing he should've, but... He didn't know why he didn't feel the courage to call him or text him, but he definitely feels it now.

Jisung dials the number, seeing that it's almost midnight. He hopes that Minho picks up the phone for him, feeling this strange wanting to hear his voice right now.

...

...

...

"Hello? Who is this? I swear to god if it's one of those damn tele--" Minho starts, but is cut off.

"Minhoooo," Jisung giggles, feeling giddy at Minho's aggravation. Jisung curls up on his bed as he holds the phone to his ear, "What are you wearing right now?" he asks in a flirty tone.

Minho's eyes widen, recognizing Jisung's voice, "Jisung?" Hearing his voice on the other end makes him smile. He really wasn't sure if Jisung would ever call him, he was starting to lose hope of it. He hadn't seen him at the party tonight, so he just went home early.

"Mmm, yes. The one, the only," Jisung laughs.

"You sound as drunk as a skunk, dude," Minho chuckles back, going to sit down in his own bed, crawling under the covers.

"I'm perfectly sober, actually. Now, Minho... What are you wearing?" Jisung persists, wondering if Minho will go along with Jisung's dirty talk.

"Oh? Haha, I'm just in some sweatpants. I was about to go to sleep," Minho answers, still surprised at the call and not picking up on the intentions quite yet.

"Only sweatpants...?"

Minho can't help but blush, his cheeks heating up, "Well, yes. What are you wearing?"

Jisung bites his lip, "Ah, I'm still dressed sadly. Come fix that, please,"

Minho looks around his room, feeling a wave of embarrassment coming over him, he's talked dirty before, but this just came out of left field for him. He waits a moment, but finally answers, "Baby, I can't come over right now... How about you undress yourself for me and explain everything you're doing?"

Jisung puts his phone on speaker as he sets it down onto his bed, needing two hands to remove his shirt, "I'm removing my shirt for you right now, Minho."

"Mhm, go on..." Minho hums, nervously adjusting himself on his bed, feeling himself already hardening in his sweatpants.

Minho can hear Jisung's bed shifting as he hears him get up.

"Now I'm sliding down my jeans— nng," he groans, struggling to get his jeans off, but he eventually does, "Ugh, there we go. I'm finally half-naked for you..." Jisung says in a seductive voice, laying back on the bed and is back to being able to speak right into the phone.

Minho smiles, finding it funny how Jisung struggled. He could hear him wriggling around on the bed. When Jisung gets closer to the phone again it sends a small chill down Minho's spine, hearing Jisung's soft voice speaking to him in such a way, "I'm hard for you right now... Do you want me to touch myself?" Minho asks, already circling his fingers around the bottom of his stomach.

Jisung knows he's hard, himself, and he hopes that Minho is getting turned on by him too, "Yes, as long as we can touch ourselves at the same time," Jisung almost whispers, letting out a low gasp when he grabbed ahold of his cock, the sensitivity of his own touch being amplified by the coke.

Minho bites his lip as he hears Jisung gasp, trailing down as he slides his hand under his briefs, beginning to stroke his shaft, "Mmm, kind of noisy, are you?" Minho smirks as he teases Jisung, "I bet I could make you wake the whole neighborhood if you let me."

Jisung hums, stroking himself to the sound of Minho's voice talking back to him, "Oh really? Tell me what you would do to me..." Jisung can't help as he let out a soft moan as he tightens his grip on his length, massaging it up and down a bit faster.

Minho uncontrollably moves his hips in a circular motion as he continues touching himself, thinking of what he would do if Jisung were there with him, "First I would trail down your body slowly, teasing the hell out of you as you beg for me to give your cock the attention it deserves..." he pauses for a moment to catch his breath, it turns into a subtle panting as he continues, "Then, I would tease your head with a few warm licks,"

Jisung releases a loud moan into the phone, after Minho saying that he goes to massage his head, it being extremely sensitive. Jisung rolls over on his bed onto his knees and his head pressed into his pillow as he fantasizes about Minho, "Fuck, Minho..." he pants, his heart feeling like it's about to pound out of his chest.

"I'd like to," Minho chuckles, smirking as he unremittingly rubs himself, also fantasizing about Jisung. There's just something about that guy, Minho thinks as he lets out a deep, low groan.

Jisung moans loudly as he cums hard into his palm, the hot juices getting everywhere and drip onto his bedspread underneath of him, "Mmm..." Is all he can get out as he falls onto his bed, his eyes glazed over and half-open from all the pleasure he just experienced.

Minho cums soon after Jisung's relentless moaning stops, having been ready with tissues, unlike Jisung. Minho cleans himself up quickly and rests back on his bed with the phone laying beside him, a feeling of loneliness coming over him, "I missed your voice... I wasn't sure if you would ever call," Minho says softly.

Jisung smiles when he hears this, having always wanted to be missed. Chan never had a chance to miss him since they were almost always around each other, and Jisung didn't have many other friends that would care enough to get to the point of missing him. It feels good to be missed, to be wanted.

"Of course I was going to call," Jisung says, all the darkness around him filling the room and making it seem crowded, so he whispers, "Why did you think I wouldn't?"

"I didn't know how you were feeling about the whole situation. You're hard to read, but I've been hoping for your voice to come up when I answered the phone, and here you are," Minho explains, hoping to not seem too cheesy, but nighttime always causes his emotions to come out. He can't help but feel connected to Jisung in some way. He's not even drunk this time, but he can still feel it.

"You're such a kind guy, why did you want to get mixed up with a mess like me, Minho?" Jisung asks, pulling the covers up over him, feeling his high wearing off and it's bringing his emotions back up to the surface instead of being numbed by the cocaine.

"Crying doesn't make you a mess, Jisung. It just makes you human, you know that right?" Minho replies, knowing he probably doesn't know the whole story, in fact, Minho knows he doesn't, but he really wants to learn. He's curious about Jisung. He wants to learn more about him, about the way his mind works and how he feels.

Jisung closes his eyes, his thoughts of Chan flooding to the front of his mind as he thinks about his breakdowns. He hasn't seen Chan at all this week. It's been the longest they've ever gone without seeing each other before and is a big reason why Jisung needed that cocaine so badly tonight. Is that the reason he called Minho...? Jisung shames himself, not wanting to be that person that uses someone in replace of another. Minho was there for him just like Chan had been so many years before. Chan isn't here anymore, but Minho is. Does that give Jisung the right to so easily replace Chan? Is Minho taking his place?

Jisung can feel that Minho is a good guy. A guy that could actually have mutual feelings. He wants to see how things go with Minho, but he doesn't want Chan to keep being in the back of his mind. He hasn't broken down since the party when Minho calmed him down, but he doesn't know what he will do when he has one now. Jisung used to would either already be with Chan, or he would call him and he'd come to help him through it.

Jisung sniffles as he feels so much confusion. He doesn't know what to think about any of this. He misses Chan so much, but he knows he won't leave Felix. He would never leave Felix for him...

"You're so good..." Jisung whispers softly into the phone, "Thank you."

"Jisung, are you okay? Do you need anything?" Minho asks, able to hear the hurt behind Jisung's words when he speaks. Minho worries about Jisung. He doesn't know what his life is like or anything that's happened to him, but he wishes he could help him. Minho has always been like that -- wanting to help anyone he can. Minho tries to stop thinking so deeply like this, not wanting to remember how he couldn't help the one person in his life who needed it most.

"I'm okay. I just wanted to thank you for picking up the phone and talking to me," Jisung says sleepily, falling asleep soon after replying to Minho.

"I'll always pick up when you call, okay, Jisung?" Minho says, a small sense of urgency in his voice. He will never not pick up his phone when he gets a phone call. He's never made that mistake again. He waits a while for Jisung's reply, but it never comes. Minho smiles, hearing soft snoring coming from the other end. He decides he should get some sleep as well.

End of Chapter Two: Part One

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you like my stories, feel free to follow me on twitter @pinearah :)


	5. Chapter Five

~ Earlier that night

Chan finds himself constantly looking around at the crowd of people at his house tonight, not seeing Jisung anywhere. It hurts his heart to know Jisung didn't come this week. He hasn't seen him at all this past week and it feels so weird for Chan. Instead of spending all of his time with Jisung, he's been spending that time with Felix.

Speak of the devil -- Felix comes up to Chan with their drinks and he smiles happily at him, having already had a few drinks before the ones he's currently holding, "Here you go, Channie," Felix says in a sweet voice, it makes him happy that he's been able to spend more time with his love.

Felix leans his head against Chan's shoulder as he drinks his drink, "Are you looking for him...?" Felix asked, knowing he's been looking around at everyone more than usual.

Chan turns to look at Felix and gives him a warm smile before kissing his forehead, "I'm only looking at you, Felix," he says as he ruffles his hair. Seeing Felix _does_ make him feel much better, but the action of ruffling Felix's hair brings him back down a bit, it being something he would always do to Jisung. He has to stop letting everything remind him of Jisung.

Chan looks down at his drink and back at Felix, clinking his cup against his before he chugs it down. Felix doesn't chug his, but he does down it pretty soon after Chan is done his.

Chan didn't buy any cocaine for tonight, having been trying to cut back for Felix. If he keeps having these thoughts over Jisung, he's going to need more than he thought. He'll have to stop by Changbin's in the morning, he thinks to himself.

"Chan," Felix starts, putting his cup down and grabbing ahold of Chan's loose white shirt, "Kiss me?" He asks in a silky voice, wanting Chan's affection badly.

Chan smirks at Felix's sudden request but doesn't hesitate as he connects their lips into a deep kiss. Chan is almost as addicted to Felix's taste as he is coke, he can't help but pull Felix into his chest as they kiss. Their tongues intertwined, Chan's tongue attacking Felix's with a strong passion and need.

Felix lets go of Chan's shirt as he's pulled into him, his hand trailing all over Chan's rock hard chest. Felix loves when Chan dominates his mouth like this, but he especially loves when Chan lets him go down to his neck and leave his claim on him -- which is exactly what he does right now. Felix sucks on Chan's neck roughly, leaving a lot of dark reddish marks to show Chan is his.

Felix absolutely hated when they first started dating and he would see marks already on Chan's neck. He knew they were from Jisung. Later into their relationship, when things got more serious, however, Chan never had any more marks. He wonders if he and Jisung stopped doing that kind of stuff, or if Chan just asked him to stop leaving marks. From what he walked in on last week, he believes it to be the latter...

~ Next morning

Chan wakes up pretty early in the morning, having Felix laying over his chest still asleep. He smiles as he looks down at Felix on him, gently rubbing his head and moving his hair out of his face so he can see his handsome freckled face. Chan thinks about how much he loves having Felix in his life, knowing he shouldn't do what he's about to do.

Chan knows about his addictive personality, Felix has told him many times that that's what he thinks he has. It makes sense to him, Chan gets hooked on things very easily - from drugs to people to alcohol, it doesn't matter, he gets addicted. Addicted to the way he feels when taking drugs and drinking alcohol, addicted to the way certain people make him feel.

Chan lets go off Felix's head and tries to ease himself out from under him, laying him gently back onto the bed as Chan gets up. He goes and pulls the blanket up over Felix and gives his forehead and warm kiss before going to the closet and getting some clothes on. Chan dresses himself and gets his keys before leaving Felix, locking the door behind him so no one can disturb his boy.

Felix sleeps soundly as if Chan were still there, curling up with the blankets and pillows on Chan's bed.

Chan goes out to his car and drives to Changbin's house. He mentally apologizes to Felix as soon as he gets to the front door of Changbin's. Chan goes into the house and greets a few of the people he knows that are still awake before getting to Changbin's room. He knocks on the door and waits.

...

Changbin groggily opens the door and looks up at Chan standing in front of him. Changbin is holding his sweatpants up with one hand and rubbing his eyes with the other, "Hey, man... What are you doing here so early in the morning?"

Chan smirked, seeing Hyunjin in the bed from behind Changbin, "I'm just here to get the usual, I didn't mean to come at such an unusual time."

Changbin ties the string to his sweatpants so they stay up and he waves Chan in, going back into his room and to his dresser.

Chan follows Changbin, nodding at Hyunjin before going to the dresser. This is where Changbin usually keeps most of his drug stash -- he keeps them all in separate locked boxes. Cocaine is the white box. How fitting.

Changbin chuckles as he unlocks it, pulling out a baggie, "I see that you don't have Jisung following you around anymore."

Chan scoffs, pulling out his wallet and money, exchanging money for the plastic baggie of cocaine, "What do you mean? You know he doesn't come with me sometimes."

Changbin locks the box back up, "Oh, I know. It's just, he came here on his own for this exact thing," he flicks the baggie in Chan's hands, "Seems he's hooked too, haha."

Chan is surprised to hear Changbin disclose this, "Jisung did what?"

"He seemed really desperate for it last night. He's always so on-edge, he doesn't like to joke around apparently," Changbin explains, not caring too much about the situation, he just wants to get back to Hyunjin.

Hearing this makes Chan feel upset for some reason, a sort of anger filling him up, "Don't sell to Jisung, Changbin. Okay?" Chan says in a demanding tone, not wanting Jisung to get addicted or go down the same path that he knows people in Jisung's past has. He couldn't handle Jisung going through that.

"Don't _sell_ to him? What are you going to do to keep me from it?" Changbin counters.

Chan pulls out some more cash and hands it to him, "I'm serious. I hear about you selling to him again, and you'll regret it."

Changbin laughs as he takes the money, "Is that a threat? Don't worry, this will be enough to keep me from selling to him for a while," he pats Chan's chest before going back to his bed to crawl into with Hyunjin.

Chan hears Hyunjin let out a whine, having missed Changbin. Chan shakes his head and leaves the room, closing the door behind him. Why would Jisung come here alone? Chan knows how much Jisung hates big crowds like the ones that are always at Changbin's parties.

Chan confusedly walks back out to his car, laying back against his seat as he thinks. Jisung shouldn't be coming here to get drugs, he should be doing them with Chan who can monitor his intake. Chan knows how cautious Jisung usually is with his usage, so he fears that Jisung might already have a slight addiction to cocaine.

Chan slams his hand against the steering wheel, angry at himself that he can't contact him or be with him like he used to be. He tries to tell himself that it's for the best, but after hearing he went to get his own coke, he's not so sure anymore.

He told Felix he was going to try and stay away from Jisung, and he wasn't going to break that promise to Felix so soon. Chan wants Felix to be able to trust him. He wants Felix to feel safe and secure in their relationship. It always hurt him how insecure Felix would get when Chan was hanging out with Jisung. Chan knows Felix had a legitimate reason for getting upset and feeling insecure, he and Jisung _were_ still sleeping together. It was just something to normal for the two of them that it hardly crossed Chan's mind. The whole thing came to the forefront when he and Felix became more committed to one another and when Felix would explain his feelings about Chan and Jisung's relationship to him.

Chan wants to stay loyal to Felix. He doesn't want to see the look he saw in Felix's eyes that night when he caught him and Jisung together ever again. It broke his heart in two to see how hurt Felix was. He was so afraid that he would leave him right in that moment. Just thinking about it makes Chan want to rush home to Felix.

~ Days later

Jisung used all of the cocaine he bought from Changbin much faster than he thought he would. It's starting to get to the point where right after Jisung's high wears off, he wants to immediately snort some more. It's getting messier and messier every time he uses, too. He'll snort it off any surface he's around whenever he got a craving for it.

Jisung can't get that night on the phone with Minho out of his head every time he gets high. Whenever he's in that headspace, he can't help but want to see him or hear his voice in his ear. He hasn't talked to Minho since that night, but he stares at his number for a while whenever he's high. He's starting to not remember much of what happens during his high. Jisung knows he probably shouldn't drink while also snorting coke, but he does.

When Jisung _isn't_ high from the cocaine or drunk from the alcohol, he's thinking of Chan. Chan hasn't even tried to contact Jisung, and it pains him to think about. Jisung and Chan had spent so much time together, only for Felix to come in and tear them apart. Jisung can't help but be jealous of Felix. He has what Jisung has always wanted. Chan's true love.

Jisung has been laying in bed the past few days, just unable to get up and do anything productive. His head has been hurting like crazy and they won't go away with medicine. He's craving cocaine and he doesn't want to get up and go to Changbin's, so he settles on texting him.

_Hey, do you think you could drop by my house to give me some of the stuff? I'll pay you extra. - Jisung_

Jisung hopes that Changbin will do it, he seems like there's not much he wouldn't do for money. He believes that's the whole reason he got into the dealing business -- it brings it a lot of hard cash.

_Haha, I won't be selling to you anymore, actually. - Changbin_

Jisung's eyes go into a squint when he reads Changbin's text back to him. What the fuck? What does he mean he won't be selling to him anymore?

_Uh, what? Wtf? Why not? I'll pay you extra. - Jisung_

_That is secret information ;) - Changbin_

Jisung just about launches his phone across the room, but he doesn't. He doesn't want to have to get it if he were to do that. Instead, he squeezes it extremely hard, leaving two red lines from the imprints the phone made in his palm.

_Listen, Changbin. I'll literally do anything. Please. - Jisung_

A few minutes pass and there's still no response.

_Changbin, answer me dammit! - Jisung_

Jisung is just about in tears when he realizes he won't be getting anything to ease his headache or get him high. Jisung feels miserable as he lay curled up in his bed, his brain feeling like it's pounding against his skull. This pain is excruciating.

Jisung tries to think of why Changbin refused to bring him any cocaine. He said he would pay extra, so what the hell? Jisung frowns to himself as he wonders if Chan said anything to Changbin. Why would he? He doesn't know anything.

**End of Chapter Two: Part Two**


	6. Chapter Six

~

Jisung has tried to contact Changbin many times over the next few days to no avail. Changbin won't answer his phone _or_ any of the texts Jisung has sent him. Jisung's head has hurt so bad that he wishes someone would just blow his brains out so he wouldn't have to feel anything. He's wanted to get drunk, but he doesn't have anymore whiskey.

Jisung can feel what's about to happen coming and he begs for it to stop. He feels the fear. The dread. It's creeping up on him like a tiger creeps up on its prey. His emotions being the tiger and Jisung being the prey. He covers his mouth with his hand as his eyebrows knit together, starting to sob uncontrollably.

Jisung can't move as a bunch of intrusive thoughts invade his head, tearing his mind apart piece by piece. What has a piece of shit like him been doing these past few days? Absolutely nothing. He can't even get out of bed. He hasn't felt joy or pleasure in anything. He can't seem to understand how he can be so numb, but still feel enough to be crying like he is now. Nothing makes sense to him. His mind is flooded.

Jisung cries out, letting out a whine for Chan as his eyes become blurry from all of his tears.

Where is Chan?

Jisung looks around his room, getting confused that Chan isn't there with him.

Chan?

Jisung's breathing hitched as he frantically looks for him, too weak to actually get up from his sitting position. Jisung wails from the pain of his headache and from the overwhelming fear and dread taking over his body. He _needs_ Chan here with him. It's never been this bad before.

Jisung shakily gets his phone from the nightstand, tears starting to pool onto the screen as he dials Chan's number.

...

...

...

Chan isn't picking up the phone. Jisung starts to freak out even more when he sees Chan not picking up. He tries again. Please answer. Please answer.

...

...

...

Jisung cries out loudly as Chan doesn't answer again, "F-Fuck..." Jisung curses between his sobs, his voice as shaky as his hands. He hangs up a few seconds later, ending up leaving a three-second message for Chan's phone. Jisung doesn't notice, he can't focus.

Jisung hiccups, breathing heavily as he cries. He needs someone here. He can't handle it. He doesn't know what's happening to him and he's just so scared. Why is this happening? Jisung grabs his head, putting his eyes into his palms as he rocks back and forth. His hands get wet from his tears, his body starting to shake from this unknown fear.

Jisung moves one of his hands from his eyes and looks back at the phone. No returning call from Chan. Nothing.

Jisung reaches over to his phone and trembles as he types in Minho's number.

...

...

...

"Jisung? You always seem to call me at night, huh?" Minho chuckles, but stops when he hears quiet weeping from the other end, "Jisung...? Is everything okay?"

Jisung breaks down when he hears Minho's voice, falling apart hearing that someone finally answered his pleas, "P-Please help m-me," Jisung manages to get out, afterward letting out a soft wail.

"Yes-- Jisung, I'll be right there, okay? I'll be there as fast as I can. You have your location on right?" Minho asks in a panic, immediately getting up and getting his jacket on and grabbing his keys, keeping the phone held up by his shoulder.

Jisung hums back, unable to get anything else out.

Minho checks and, yes, Jisung's location is on for friends. Minho's heavy breathing can be heard over the phone as he rushes out of the house and gets into his car, "Do you want me to stay on the phone until I get there, Jisung?" Minho asks, turning the ignition on and he begins his drive to Jisung's house.

All Minho can hear is Jisung's sobs and whines coming from the other line, "I'm not hanging up, okay? Is the door unlocked?" Minho steps on the gas, going a few more miles per hour than he should over the speed limit.

Jisung sniffles, "Mhm..." He hopes Minho is able to hear his agreement, still shaking as he lays in his bed.

A few minutes pass and Jisung can hear a car pulling into his driveway, "Jisung, I'm here. I'm coming, okay? Everything is going to be okay," Minho says and the last thing Jisung hears before Minho hangs up is his car door slamming shut. The next thing he hears is his door opening up.

"Jisung? Which room is yours?" Minho asks, his voice notably shaken as he walks around Jisung's house. He hears crying from behind one of the doors and he opens it, opening to see Jisung curled up in a ball on the bed.

Jisung lifts his head and sees Minho, seeing someone being there for him brings him some sort of hope in the emotion pit of feeling like he's dying. Jisung tries to sit up, his intense sobbing not stopping. He feels like he can barely breathe anymore.

Minho rushes over to the bed, getting onto it and he wraps his arms around Jisung, "Jisung... It's going to bed okay, I promise. Please breathe for me, okay?" Minho asks in a serious tone, wanting to be able to calm Jisung down as soon as he can. He doesn't know how long this has been going on, but from his knowledge about what he thinks is happening to Jisung, he could pass out from being overloaded.

Jisung weakly lays his body against Minho, trying to take deep breaths, but his breathing won't stop hitching.

"Breathe in slowly, Jisung..." Minho gently strokes Jisung's hair, talking softly to him.

Jisung does as Minho says, his body shaking in Minho's arms.

"Now hold that breath, and then breathe out slowly," Minho instructs, knowing that this is the way he would always get his mother to calm down from her panic attacks.

Jisung does this a few times, remembering that this is what Chan has told him to do as well. He covers his puffy face with his hands as he continues the instructions over and over, not wanting Minho to see him like this. It's never been this bad before.

Minho hums softly as he continues to stroke Jisung's hair, holding him close to his body, "Everything is going to be alright. You're not in any danger, Jisung. It's okay," Minho carries on in reassuring Jisung.

They lay there like that for about twenty minutes before Jisung has calmed down enough to stop shaking, but his breathing is still erratic.

Minho gives Jisung a tender kiss on Jisung's forehead, "Have you eaten today, Sung?" Minho asks, wanting to make sure Jisung has been taking care of himself.

Jisung shakes his head as he shrugs, his bottom lip trembling, still trying to shield his face from Minho's view.

Minho puts the back of his hand against Jisung's forehead to test his temperature, "Have you been sick?" Minho looks around Jisung's room, seeing it looks like it hasn't really been touched for a while other than a small baggie on the floor on top of a pile of clothes, some white powder specks around it.

Jisung shrugs again before gripping onto his head, his headache becoming more noticeable after calming down from his breakdown, "I-I just haven't been able to do a lot recently... I've felt so exhausted..." Jisung tries to explain what's been going on to the best of his ability.

Minho fears that Jisung might be going through some sort of withdrawal, "Have you- uhm, been taking drugs?" Minho chances by asking, he has to know. He knows these signs. He's seen it all before. Minho doesn't think it's only the drugs that are causing this sort of reaction, though. Minho is starting to see more of his mother in Jisung's actions, seeing the signs of depression.

Jisung shifts his eyes, embarrassed of his own abuse. He used to tell himself he would never be like this, he didn't think it would happen to him since he had been so careful... Or he thought he was being careful. He curses at himself in his head, wanting to blame Chan for leaving him all alone, but he knows it's really all his own fault. It's hard to take responsibility for something so bad that you've done to yourself.

Jisung eventually nods, crossing his arms in an attempt to shut himself off from Minho.

Minho scoots closer to Jisung, gently putting a hand on his shoulder, "Hey, it's going to be okay. Let me make you some soup, you really need to eat, Jisung."

"Why are you so nice to me?"

Minho gets up off the bed, going towards the door, "I like you, Jisung. I don't know what exactly that entails yet, but I'm curious about you. I can't explain it fully, but I care about you."

Minho's words bring a soft smile to Jisung's face. Someone cares about him. Minho cares about him.

After a few minutes, Jisung looks up to see Minho coming back into his room carrying a bowl of soup. He can see the steam coming from the bowl and it makes his stomach growl, "You really made me soup..." Jisung's eyes widen a bit, genuinely surprised.

Minho laughs, sitting down on the bed carefully as to not spill the soup, "Yes, I did. I told you I would," he winks at him as he hands him the bowl of soup.

Jisung eats the soup right up, not pausing to make any conversation. Minho doesn't mind though, seeing Jisung eat makes him feel happy and accomplished. He wonders if Jisung has even gotten out of bed recently... Does he have a job? Minho knows that he has work early the next morning and that it's getting late. Maybe Jisung won't mind if Minho stays the night.

"Hey, Jisung?" Minho starts, laying back on Jisung's bed, "Do you think it would be alright if I stayed the night? I want to keep an eye on you," Minho smirks, ruffling up Jisung's fluffy hair.

Jisung blushes as Minho does that, loving the attention he's getting from Minho. Jisung sets the now empty soup bowl down on the bed and crawls over to Minho, "Mhm, I want you to stay," Jisung says as a wide smile spreads across his face, but he winces when a sharp pain goes through his head, having to grab it with his hand.

Minho gets worried as Jisung grabs his head, gently lifting his hand to hold onto Jisung's arm, "Does your head hurt that bad?" Minho asks, it worrying him a lot about how intense Jisung's headaches seem to be. Minho thinks back to the baggie and white specks of powder near it. Could Jisung be doing cocaine...? Minho's eyebrows furrow as he thinks of Jisung doing such hard drugs, but he just softly strokes his arm, "Do you want me to get you some Tylenol?"

Jisung groans in an irritated manner, his headache causing him to get a bit frustrated, "I've tried Tylenol, I've tried ibuprofen, I've tried it all. None of it ever works. None of it ever makes my headaches go away, dammit!" Jisung curses, holding onto his head as he curls up on the bed.

Minho sighs when he watches Jisung curl up in pain, "It's okay, Sung... I wish you weren't in so much pain," Minho hears sniffling coming from Jisung and it makes his heart hurt, not liking seeing him hurt like this. He lays down with Jisung and carefully wraps an arm around him, softly stroking Jisung's head.

Jisung hums as Minho strokes his head and holds him. He's missed being held like this. Minho feels so warm against Jisung's back and Jisung loves the feeling. When Minho moves his arm around Jisung's waist, Jisung shyly reaches and holds onto Minho's hand. Gosh, he's just so warm... Jisung thinks that he must feel so cold to him -- he hopes that Minho doesn't mind.

Minho smiles as he feels Jisung hold onto his hand he wrapped around him, liking how their temperatures complement each other so well. Minho hopes that Jisung doesn't feel too cold though, so he adjusts himself so he's holding Jisung closer to him, resting his forehead against the back of Jisung's head. Minho hopes the rest of their night together can go as wonderfully as this.

~

Chan and Felix are laying in Chan's bed together that night breathing heavily. Chan flops back onto his back on the bed after giving Felix a long kiss, "God, I love you, Felix..."

Felix is huddled up against Chan's bare chest, smiling happily up at his flushed face, "I love you, Chan," Felix says as he lays his head on Chan's chest, loving how he's able to hear his heart beating in his chest -- it sounds quite fast and it makes Felix chuckle to himself.

Chan runs his hand through Felix's hair before continuing to stroke his cheek, "Felix, I'll be right back. I'm going to go clean up a bit," Chan sits up slowly, Felix sitting up with him and giving him a pouty face.

Felix needily grabs ahold of Chan's hand, "Not too long, okay?" Felix gives Chan a big puppy dog face and gives his hand a squeeze before letting him go.

Chan leans over and gives Felix a loving kiss, "I promise," Chan gets up out of bed, leaning down and picking up his boxers from the floor and he puts them on before going into his bathroom to check his phone as he washes his face.

Chan feels worry go through his body as he turns on his phone and sees his notifications...

_Missed call from Jisung (2)_

_New Voicemail - Jisung_

Chan's eyes widen. Jisung hasn't reached out to him since that night at the party. Is something wrong? Is all that goes through Chan's head as he stares at the voicemail, nervous to click on it, but he does.

The voicemail starts and all Chan hears is intense crying and then Jisung's voice cracking as he curses, then the voicemail ends. Chan feels the fear rising within him, knowing Jisung must be having a breakdown. His bottom lip starts to quiver as he thinks about Jisung being alone for one of them. It scares him even more when he sees that the message was left _2 hours ago_.

Chan begins to get frantic, opening the bathroom door and hurrying to his closet to pull on some jeans before putting his phone into his pocket.

Felix sees Chan rush out of the bathroom and gets worried, "Chan? Are you okay?" Felix asks, pulling the covers up over him so his chest isn't exposed to the cool air of Chan's room.

Chan comes back down to Earth when he hears Felix's voice talking to him, stopping in his tracks to look at him. Chan can't help the tears welling up in his eyes, knowing that Felix would hate hearing that he has to leave... and _where_ he's leaving to.

"I-I..." Chan starts, his mind filled with Jisung, but his heart aches for Felix, "I'm so sorry, Felix... I have to go, I promise I'll be home soon. I promise. I'm sorry," Chan stutters, going over to Felix embrace him. Chan's mind is so focused on Jisung, he can't seem to speak coherently, but he hopes that Felix will understand.

Felix watches Chan as he comes over and embraces him, his chest getting hit with this feeling of sadness. He wants to pretend he doesn't know why, but he knows. Felix knows that this has something to do with Jisung. Felix feels his voice catch in his throat, not able to answer back, but he shows Chan as much as an understanding smile as he can muster.

Chan kisses the top of Felix's head, Felix can almost hear Chan whispering that he's sorry again. Felix watches sadly as Chan rushes out of the room, having grabbed his shirt from the floor.

Felix sighs to himself as he lays back down in Chan's bed, curling up into a ball, not wanting to think too much about what just happened. Felix wishes he could just empty his thoughts completely.

~

Chan drives over to Jisung's house as fast as he can, knowing he shouldn't be that reckless, but he hasn't had contact with Jisung in so long that it's been getting to him. It's so different not having Jisung around and when Chan heard his cries on that voicemail, all of his emotions rushed to the surface.

Chan gets out of his car and slams the car door, quickly hurrying up the steps and opening the door to Jisung's, knowing it's unlocked. He used to always get mad at Jisung about leaving his door unlocked like this...

Chan goes back to Jisung's room and stops in the doorway, a pang going through his chest. Chan sees Jisung curled up in bed, but what he doesn't expect is seeing a boy holding him already. He sees the boy's arm wrapped around Jisung's waist and cuddling with him like he used to do.

"Jisung...?" Chan hears his own words slip out of his mouth involuntarily, coming out as a whisper. Chan sees Jisung's body stirring, and it makes Chan take a step back.

Jisung rubs his eyes, thinking he had heard his door open to his house. He shifts his head and looks towards the door to his room, seeing a figure standing there. It's hard to see since it's quite dark in the house.

"Chan?" Jisung continues to rub his eyes, thinking he sees Chan standing in his doorway. He almost wants to call out to the figure again, thinking the outline looks just like his Chan.

Jisung feels an arm around him already and gets a bit confused. Who's here? Jisung looks behind him and sees Minho's face, seeing him makes his memory of that night come back and he smiles. Minho was there for him.

Chan sees Jisung start to move and it makes him back up even more. He shouldn't be here. Why is he here? Chan's heart pounds in his chest, turning around and quickly walking back out of Jisung's house. Chan doesn't even notice the tears coming down his face as he gets back into his car.

Jisung looks back to the door of his room and sees the figure is gone. Is he seeing things? Jisung shakes his head and curls back up against Minho who is fast asleep. What time even is it? Jisung flips his phone over.

_2:00 AM_

Jisung tries to get Chan off his mind. Why is he everywhere? Jisung thinks that he must've been seeing things and goes back to sleep.

Chan has his forehead pressed against the top of his steering wheel, not sure what he was doing coming here like this. Hearing Jisung crying like that in the voicemail he left did something to Chan. Chan worries what might've happened if he _did_ answer Jisung's calls two hours earlier. He knows he would've gone to him.

Chan shakes his head, almost thankful that someone was there with Jisung, but he can't deny the hurt feelings he felt when he saw Jisung in bed with another man. Jisung has never been with anyone but Chan and Chan knows that. Maybe things in both of their lives are changing.

Is the change for the better?

**End of Chapter Two: Part Three**


	7. Chapter Seven

Minho's phone alarm goes off early the next morning and Minho groans, having been up later than he should've been with him having work the next morning. Minho sees Jisung still next to him and it brings a small smile to his face, gently brushing through Jisung's hair with his fingers, "Jisung, wake up."

Jisung hums, having not slept very well after he woke up that night and thought he saw Chan in his doorway. Jisung rolls over to face his body towards Minho and smiles when he looks at him, "Don't tell me you have to go..."

Minho trails his hand down and grasps onto Jisung's, "I sadly have to, Sung. I have to go to work early during the weekdays," Minho leans forward and leaves a soft kiss against Jisung's forehead, "Please call me if something like this happens again, okay, Jisung? I promise you that I will come to you," Minho reassures Jisung as he lifts himself from the bed.

Jisung nods at Minho's words, hearing what he says hits him in a different way.

Minho looks around and realizes he didn't bring any clothes to change into. He didn't think he was going to end up spending the night with Jisung. He should've known better with how late it was and how upset Jisung seemed on the phone, but he was in too much of a rush to get over here to comfort Jisung.

"Do you, uh... Have any nice button-up shirts that I could borrow just for today?" Minho asks Jisung, figuring his jeans would work. He just needs a nice shirt.

"I'm not sure if it will fit you, but I think I have one," Jisung says as he gets up, going towards his dresser and opening it to find a dark blue button-up. He pulls the shirt out and hands it to Minho, "Here you go, I'm not sure what size you are."

Minho inspects the shirt and smiles to find they wear the same size, "It'll be perfect, thank you Jisung," Minho strips himself of the shirt he was wearing and he puts on the button up Jisung lent him, buttoning it up.

Jisung bites his lip as Minho removes his shirt, seeing his muscular chest again. Jisung can't get over how fit Minho is. He remembers when he had first seen him at Chan's party and when they were on the bed together half-naked. Jisung feels his face turning bright red as he thinks back.

"Do you, uhm... Do you dance or something?" Jisung decides to ask, having wanted to since he first saw him dancing in the crowd. He was just so good, he couldn't _not_ be a dancer.

Minho smirks as he finished buttoning up the shirt, going over to Jisung's dresser to look for some cologne, "I actually am," Minho chuckles as he sprays on the only cologne Jisung had. Minho smiles as he sprays it on himself, liking how much he smells like Jisung now, "How did you guess?"

Jisung sits on the side of the bed, "You danced really well at the party that one time.. And--" Jisung lets out an awkward laugh, "You just have the build of one, I guess?" Jisung rubs the back of his head, embarrassed at his words.

Minho's smile grows wider as Jisung talks, "Mhm, I have the build, huh?" Minho walks over to him and stands in front of him, running a hand from Jisung's shoulder down his arm, "Why are you being so shy now?" Minho brings his hand back up and tilts Jisung's head up to look Minho in the eyes, "You weren't very shy on the phone last week if I remember correctly."

Jisung is stunned at Minho's actions, but he likes how forward he is being with him. A smile comes across Jisung's lips as he remembers the phone call they had the week prior, "I guess I wasn't, was I?" Jisung chuckles and lifts his hand up to hold onto Minho's, bringing it down to his neck as he raises his other to bring Minho down to him, "I'm still surprised you went with it."

Minho smirks as he's brought down to Jisung, wrapping his arms around Jisung's neck and sitting on top of him with his legs on either side, "Well, when a guy calls you up late at night wanting to talk dirty, how could I refuse? Especially such a handsome man such as yourself," Minho says, moving his face closer to Jisung's with each word until he finally kisses him.

Minho nibbles on Jisung's lower lips as they kiss, liking the way Jisung's hands travel across Minho's back. Jisung brings one of his hands up into Minho's hair, keeping his head close to him as they kissed with such intensity and passion. Minho presses his body forward to lead Jisung's back to press back against the bedsheets, slowly grinding his body against Jisung's as they kiss gets messier and messier -- their lust and wants overcoming them.

Minho breaks their kiss for a moment, breathing heavily as he stares down at Jisung laying under him, seeing his hair messy from falling back onto the bed. Seeing Jisung like this makes Minho smile widely, "You look so good right now, Jisung..." Minho whispers to him.

Jisung scoffs and gives him a playful push, "Do not," He retorts, shifting his head to the side and away from looking at Minho.

"Mhm..." Minho hums as he goes down and kisses along Jisung's neck, giving it a few gentle licks before going back to kissing it and leaving a subtle reddish mark. While Minho is giving Jisung's neck some love, his phone's alarm starts going off once again. Minho groans when he hears it, knowing that's his alarm to leave to go to work. His first one is to wake up and he always has a second one to alert him to actually go. He can sometimes get distracted... as he just was.

Minho lifts himself up from Jisung and stands up, straightening out his shirt and tucking it into his jeans, "I'm sorry, Sung, but I really have to go to work."

Jisung sits up and shows Minho a pouty face as he reaches out for his arm, bringing him back to him, "Are you sure--?" Jisung drags out his last word, asking in a slight baby voice. Jisung lays his head against Minho's arm as he looks up at him, not wanting him to leave him just yet. He doesn't want to be alone.

Minho sighs and ruffles Jisung's hair before placing a soft kiss on his head, "I really have to, it's an important job, Jisung."

Jisung yanks down on his arm gently, making his hand graze against Jisung's crotch, "Don't leave me like this, Minho," he whines.

Minho chuckles and winks at Jisung before giving him one last kiss, "How about if you're still feeling like this later, give me a call. Alright?" He strokes his hand down Jisung's face, taking one last eye full before leaving Jisung's room and house altogether.

Jisung pouts, crossing his arms and throwing himself back against the bed after Minho leaves. How dare Minho leave him in this state? Jisung pouts for a couple more minutes before getting up and going into his bathroom to take a shower. As Jisung strips from his clothes, his hard cock springs out from his pants as he pulls them down. Jisung shakes his head at the nuisance his desires have blessed him with and goes to start the shower, knowing it'll go down soon.

Jisung's correct and after a few minutes of no stimulation, it does go down as he bathes himself. Feeling the cold water pouring onto Jisung's body lets him be able to release some of the tension he's been feeling. He's always liked to take cold showers, there's something so calming and stress-relieving about them. Jisung sits down in the shower and lays back, letting the showerhead spray down on his body. The shower is where he likes to think and where thoughts always invade his mind.

Jisung starts thinking about last night when he woke up and thought he saw Chan's outline in his doorway. There's no way, right? Jisung shakes his head and wipes the water from his face and eyes. Chan wouldn't come to him. Not after Felix asked him to stop seeing and hanging out with him. He wouldn't betray Felix's wishes so quickly after he had found him and Chan together, would he? There's no way Felix would stay with him if Chan came to see Jisung. He always knew the two were close, but Jisung knew after Felix saw Chan on top of him that night at the party, that his patience with Chan was wearing out.

Jisung knew how Felix felt. It was the same feeling that Jisung would feel when he would see Chan and Felix together. Jisung wished he could be Felix so badly. He doesn't know how lucky he is to be Chan's. Jisung knows Chan just tries to do what he thinks is right and cares a lot about everyone he is close to. Jisung's heart hurts the more he thinks about Chan. He needs to get him off his mind or else he's going to have more bizarre hallucinations like he had last night. Jisung could hardly sleep after seeing Chan.

Why won't Chan leave Jisung's head? Jisung can't stand these continuous thoughts about him. He can't help but miss Chan. He's all Jisung has ever known and he disappeared out of his life so suddenly. The more Jisung longs for Chan, the more he craves cocaine. Anything to get his mind off of him.

Changbin still hasn't texted Jisung back. Is Jisung really going to have to go back over to Changbin's house? He despises the thought. Jisung doesn't know if he can handle all of those people without something in his system and he doesn't like the thought of driving after drinking. He knows how Chan always made sure he never did that. Chan would make sure Jisung slept over if he was too out of it to drive. What does Chan know anyway, Jisung thinks. He left.

Jisung feels himself getting frustrated the more he thinks about Chan, thinking that he's the only one that could've told Changbin to not sell to him. Jisung stands back up and turns the water off, angrily getting out of the shower and wrapping a towel around himself.

Jisung knows Chan should be home alone today -- Felix always worked during the mornings from what he remembered. Jisung sighs as he dries himself off. Everyone has a job. Jisung can feel fear rise in his stomach if he even thinks about getting a job. He's mostly done work from home.

Jisung shakes his head, not wanting to think about that anymore. He's focused on Chan. He needs to confront him about this situation, and Jisung isn't the type to confront people, but Chan is a different story.

Jisung throws his towel onto the hook and goes and pulls on some clothes, getting a big jacket from his closet before grabbing his keys. He's just going to ask Chan about the drugs. That's all. Jisung keeps repeating that to himself in his head as he walks out to his car.

Jisung begins the drive and notices how his heartbeat quickens the closer he gets to Chan's house. This used to be a common route for him to take. Jisung's mind is flooded by thoughts of Chan even after telling himself he's only going to confront him about what he said to Changbin. He can't fool himself any longer when he finally pulls into Chan's driveway. Jisung knows a big reason for coming here is to just see Chan again.

Jisung gets out of his car and nervously walks up to Chan's front door, pulling out the key he still had and he unlocks the door.

Chan hears the door to his house unlock and the front door open and he's confused. Felix isn't supposed to be home until later today, right? Chan quickly gets up and checks the clock, seeing he's right. It can't be Felix.

Chan pulls out a baseball bat from behind his bed before leaving his room, stopping in his tracks when he sees Jisung standing inside of his house.

Jisung also stops when he sees Chan, he's not sure if it was just his body stopping or if his heart stopped too. It felt like both.

Jisung got a confused look on his face as his gaze fell to the baseball bat Chan was holding, a chuckle coming from his mouth, "You gonna beat me?"

Chan curses under his breath, "Jisung, what are you doing here?" Chan asks, trying to take his eyes off of Jisung. Chan can't help but notice how restless Jisung looks. He must not be sleeping well again...

All of Jisung's feelings for Chan rush to the surface as he walked closer to him, "I had to see-- I, uh... I wanted to ask if you were the one that told Changbin to not sell to me," Jisung trails his eyes up and down Chan, admiring him like he always used to.

Chan shakes his head negatively as Jisung comes closer, "Yeah, I did. I don't want you to get addicted, Jisung."

Jisung puts his hand on Chan's shoulder, needing to touch him again. Jisung craved his touch, "You don't understand, Chan. I need it. I crave it," Jisung lets out, his voice sounding slightly raspy. He's not even sure if he's talking about the cocaine anymore.

Chan shifts away from Jisung's touch no matter how much he didn't want to. He has to stay loyal to Felix. He promised him.

"Jisung, you have to leave," Chan said firmly, hating how his voice sounds saying those words. Making Jisung leave after seeing him standing here in his house is the last thing he wanted to do today. Especially after seeing Jisung with another guy last night in his bed. Chan decides he shouldn't mention the voicemail or anything about last night.

Jisung is surprised when Chan actually pulls away from his touch, him never having done that before. Jisung's heart sinks, "Please tell Changbin to sell to me again, Chan."

Chan stands his ground, "No, Jisung. I'm not going to tell Changbin to keep selling to you. I really don't want you to get addicted, I'm serious. You're the one that always wanted to watch your intake. Now please leave my house..."

Jisung feels himself about to cry, but he holds it back, "Chan, I'm begging you, please... I need it, I-I need you," Jisung's voice breaks into a whisper towards the end.

Chan's eyes widen at Jisung's words, hearing his voice slightly crack. Chan is about to open his mouth when Jisung continues.

"I had a breakdown last night a-and you didn't pick up... You told me you would always be there for me!" Jisung cries out to Chan's face, hurt being apparent in his eyes, "I'm sorry..." Jisung instantly apologizes, feeling bad for raising his voice and blaming Chan when it wasn't completely his fault. Jisung knew that he knew he was being overdramatic as Felix would have put it if he were here. That's what he would always describe Jisung as to Chan.

"I know, I'm sorry, Jisung... I'm sorry I wasn't there," Chan's heart aches as he, against better judgment, wraps his arms around Jisung, taking him into his chest.

Jisung sniffles and whispers against Chan's chest, his arms weakly wrapping around Chan's body as well. Jisung hates how emotional he's become right now, but he can't get past something Chan just said, "Y-You know? What do you mean?"

Chan sighs when Jisung asks him that, looking up at him with his tear-stained face. Chan wipes Jisung's face gently, "I had gotten your voicemail... albeit, two hours late, but I got it. I'm so sorry I didn't answer, Jisung. I had—" Chan pauses in his speech, unsure if he should tell Jisung that he came over last night to check on him and found him with another guy. Who was he? Was it that Minho guy he met at the party that one night?

Jisung attempts to steady his breathing, listening to Chan. So he did end up leaving a short voicemail. Fuck. He really didn't mean to do that. Jisung didn't want to seem as needy for Chan as he most certainly was and has been for so long. Why does he crave Chan so badly? Minho seems like a genuinely good guy. A guy that could love him back eventually if they developed their relationship enough and spent enough time together. Jisung could see it happening. He could see an easy life being with Minho, and maybe that's what he wants, but he's not so sure right now. All Jisung knows is that he misses Chan badly and his only escape from Chan being on his mind was taken away from him by the very devil himself. 

Why does Chan hold such control over Jisung's life?

**Chapter Three: Part One**

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So, I have the next few chapters written in advance and I MUST SAY... Next chapter is gonna be good I think? 

If you want a hint... Possibly a flashback? 

Ooooo... ahhhh... Let's get it.

What are you guys thinking so far? 

Who do YOU ship so far? 

Are you rooting for Minsung and Chansung? 


	8. Chapter Eight

~ Flashback: Highschool

Jisung groans out, trying to be quiet, but failing miserably as his back is pressed against the inside of the boy's bathroom stall. Jisung's hands are entangled in Chan's hair, who's currently heavily grinding his body against Jisung's, their hands roughly grasping at each other's backs, pulling on the skin.

"Shh..." Chan whispers into Jisung's ear before maneuvering his hand down to grip onto the hardening bulge in Jisung's jeans. Chan uses his other hand to guide Jisung's hand down to his as well, enjoying the way they're touching each other together.

This situation Chan and Jisung have found themselves in is not an uncommon one, but it is definitely a new venue for their pleasures. Jisung always came over to Chan's house after his parents came home drunk or drugged up and Chan would comfort him. Sometimes... Well, most of the time, actually, that would lead to situations like this.

Chan didn't mind, though. He loved the escape he found within Jisung. He also loved that by Jisung coming and staying with him, that he didn't have to deal with his horrible home-life. Jisung didn't go into detail most of the time, but Chan saw the bruises. That was one of the parts he would never bring up, but Chan knew. It worried him. It made him want to even ask Jisung if he wanted to come and stay with him. He never did ask.

Jisung starts to pant heavily as Chan rubs him through his jeans, Jisung clumsily doing the same to Chan. Jisung gasps when Chan removes his hands and instead ventures under Jisung's shirt, pulling it up to go down and kiss down his chest and stomach. Chan always wanted Jisung to know that he thought his body was beautiful, and he would make sure to give all of his body plenty of love.

"Ch-Chan..." Jisung tried to whisper, but he can't seem to contain his voice to be that quiet.

Chan comes up, lowering Jisung's shirt back down and pressing his forehead against Jisung's, "Mmm, didn't I say to be quiet?" Chan gives Jisung a stern look at first, but then chuckles, liking to be playful with him.

Jisung runs his hands up and down Chan's back underneath his shirt, smiling and biting his lip in response to Chan. Jisung presses his body tightly against Chan's, "Shut me up, then."

Chan likes that answer and instantly crashes his lips to Jisung's, having his hand behind Jisung's head when they hit the back of the door a bit roughly.

Meanwhile, Hyunjin is coming down the hall towards the boy's bathroom. As Hyunjin enters, he hears a noise coming from one of the stalls, "Hello?" Hyunjin starts, "Chan? Jisung? Are you two in here still? Mrs. Park wanted me to come check on you two since you've been gone so long," Hyunjin goes on awkwardly, hating that he's the one that had to come.

Chan and Jisung separate when they hear Hyunjin's voice. They look at each other with panicked faces, knowing Hyunjin can't see them come out of the _same_ stall. Jisung has an idea though and quickly crawls under one of the walls that go to the next stall. Chan covers his mouth from laughter seeing Jisung on the bathroom floor like that.

Chan comes out first, "Sorry, man. I've been having some bad diarrhea. I think something we had for lunch messed up my stomach real bad," Chan holds onto his stomach as he goes towards the front of the bathroom where Hyunjin is going to wash his hands.

"O-Oh, I... I hope you feel better," Hyunjin's ears start to turn red as soon as he sees Chan. He's about to say something else when Jisung comes out too, looking more disheveled and his shirt had the first two buttons undone. Hyunjin doesn't think it used to be like that. Maybe he got too hot?

Jisung nervously goes to the front of the bathroom where the two boys are and also washes his hands, glancing over at Chan and smiling.

Hyunjin thought he saw a hickey on Jisung's neck as he passed by him. Was that there before? Hyunjin doesn't like the thoughts that are coming to his mind as he looks at the two guys washing their hands. They couldn't... right? Hyunjin rubs the back of his head when Chan turns to him after finishing drying off his hands.

"Come on, let's go back to class," Chan smiles big and winks at Hyunjin before brushing past him, walking back to their class.

Hyunjin feels his heartbeat quicken at Chan's smile and it just about stops when he winks at him. He's had the biggest crush on Chan since freshman year, but he's never directly approached him due to Jisung always being there. He wants to talk to Chan when it's just him. Maybe he's just jealous, but he doesn't like Jisung being around him all of the time. Doesn't Chan get tired of him?

Jisung hurries past Hyunjin too, trying to catch up with Chan as they go back into the classroom. Hyunjin follows closely behind them, bowing at the teacher once he closes the door. Hyunjin goes back to his seat and can't stop stealing glances towards Chan. Were he and Jisung really doing stuff back there? Hyunjin feels his face heat up at the thought of getting hot and heavy with Chan and he has to look away from him, shaking his head furiously.

Chan and Jisung take their seats next to each other, continuing the movie their class was watching. Jisung really enjoyed their film class, but Chan didn't like it that much. He much better liked teasing Jisung in the only class they had together, loving to see his shocked face when Chan would do something a small as squeeze his thigh.

A few days later, Hyunjin notices that Jisung didn't come to school that day. Chan seems to be acting the same, which Hyunjin finds interesting because when Chan isn't at school, Jisung looks like a lost puppy. Hyunjin can't stop himself from taking peeks at Chan throughout the day. They've always had most of their classes together, but Hyunjin was always too nervous to confront him before or after their classes.

Ever since the other day, Hyunjin has been thinking about differently about Chan. He couldn't stop thinking about the hickies he saw on Jisung's neck when they came out from the stalls. Hyunjin found his mind wandering into the dirtier side of his brain at night when he would think about Chan.

"Hwang Hyunjin, pay attention," The teacher reprimands Hyunjin after he finds himself staring at the back of Chan's head in the middle of class. Hyunjin is startled by the sudden announcement of his name and nods, apologizing, and going back to working on his classwork.

Hyunjin heard Chan's laugh when the teacher called him out and that made him smile. Maybe he should confess to Chan today... Hyunjin's mind gets so preoccupied while thinking about the possibility of confessing to Chan, he still doesn't complete his worksheet. It doesn't have to be turned in today, does it?

Another boy in their class nudges Hyunjin, "Why do you keep staring at Chan? What are you, gay or something?" He laughs, his friends joining in and laughing as well.

Hyunjin shakes his head, "I'm not staring, and yeah? So what if I am?" Hyunjin counters, never having been afraid of his sexuality.

The boys are about to say something back when the bell rang for lunch. They instead grab their stuff and hurry off to lunch, not caring as much for messing with Hyunjin as they care about getting food.

Hyunjin finishes packing everything into his backpack and sees Chan still sitting at his desk. Maybe now is the time, Hyunjin thinks to himself. He decides to chance it and go up to him, "Hey, are you going to lunch?"

Chan calmly looks up at Hyunjin, "I was going to stay and finish this assignment, I don't really have to go to lunch today."

Hyunjin wonders if he says that because Jisung isn't at school today, knowing they always eat together. Hyunjin hums as he sits down in the desk next to Chan, "I could go get lunch for you so you could stay here and finish, it's really no problem..." Hyunjin offers, hoping he doesn't seem too weird.

"Nah, you don't have to. I'll be fine," Chan says and shows a smile, but Hyunjin notices something seems off. Did something happen to Jisung?

"Would you, uhm... Like some company? I could help you finish the assignment if you need any help," Hyunjin tries to stay bright, but he knows there's a cloud of awkwardness surrounding them right now.

Chan doesn't really want any company right now, but he doesn't get a chance to say anything when Hyunjin continues speaking.

"I-I know this isn't the right time, but I don't know when else I would be able to tell you this," Hyunjin takes a deep breath, just trying to let it all out. He can't stand his questioning feelings any longer, he needs to see if he has a chance, "I've had a crush on you for a while and I was wondering if maybe we could... Go out sometime?"

Chan looks down, listening to Hyunjin confessing to him. Why now? Why him? Chan sighs, looking up at Hyunjin once he's finished with his confession with some compassion showing on his face. He feels bad for having to do this, "I'm sorry, Hyunjin. I'm not looking for a real relationship right now."

Hyunjin hears Chan turn him down, but he just shows a smile, "It's okay, Chan," Hyunjin stands back up, "I understand. I just wanted to let you know how I've been feeling... Thank you for being honest with me."

Chan watches as Hyunjin walks out of the classroom, sighing again as he rests his head against his hand, staring down at his still unfinished assignment. He misses Jisung. He never misses school. Chan pulls out his phone and still has no message back from Jisung. He hasn't replied to him since last night and it's been worrying him a lot.

Chan has been distracted all day, waiting for Jisung to message him back. Chan doesn't even want to think of the worst. He's noticed Jisung's been more bruised up recently and Chan has urged him to stay at his house, but Jisung never does.

Chan hits his desk and shoves the paper into his backpack. He can't concentrate on this right now. Especially not after what just happened with Hyunjin. He knew the boy liked him, but he didn't actually expect him to confess. Chan hates having to turn people down. He hates the look in their eyes when they're trying to not seem hurt.

That night when Chan comes back to his house, he finds Jisung already in his bed. He hears faint crying coming from the bed and Chan comes over to the bed quickly, "Jisung? Why weren't you at school today...?" Chan asks quietly, wrapping his arms around Jisung's body. He feels cold.

Jisung is shaking while he continues to sob into Chan's arms, happy that he is home to hold him. Jisung loves being in Chan's arms, even in a horrible mindset, being in Chan's arms eases Jisung's mind just a bit.

Chan kisses the top of Jisung's head, gently stroking his hair after he goes back to look into Jisung's eyes, "Sung, talk to me... You know you can talk to me about anything. Did something happen with your parents?" Chan tries to get Jisung to open up to him, using his other hand to gently stroke Jisung's face.

Jisung sniffles and his breathing is uneven as he looks back into Chan's eyes, hating the worry he sees within them. Jisung is glad that the room is so dim, hoping that Chan isn't able to see how red the side of Jisung's face is. Jisung presses his forehead against Chan's, it makes him able to start calming down.

"M-My mom," Jisung starts, his voice incredibly shaky since he doesn't want to have to think about what just happened today.

Chan doesn't say anything more, not wanting to pry too much. He wants Jisung to be able to open up by himself, but he does continue stroking Jisung's face and hair. Chan knows how much Jisung has told him he likes when he does that.

Jisung feels his heart starting to beat faster and he starts panting as he starts thinking about everything again. Jisung's eyes water, "Sh-She overdosed last night..."

Chan is shocked but not surprised when Jisung relays this to him, knowing how Jisung would tell him about how his parents would always come home drunk or drugged up. Chan's heart aches for Jisung though, even though he hated the way he was treated, Jisung couldn't hate his parents. Chan couldn't understand that, but everyone is different.

Chan whispered soft 'shhh's to Jisung as he wept, his head now in Chan's shoulder.

"D-Dad blamed me for the whole thing and told me to l-leave and n-never come back..." Jisung cries, his voice coming out sloppy and hard to hear, but Chan listens.

"You know you're always welcome here, Jisung. I'm so sorry..." Chan rubs Jisung's back, letting Jisung let it all out. They sit there like that for a while, but Jisung settles back down eventually, laying back on the bed with Chan.

Jisung is curled up against Chan's chest as they watch a movie. Chan turned it on to try and help distract Jisung from his own thoughts, knowing that's what always helps him.

Jisung looks up at Chan during the movie, admiring him. Chan is always there for him, he seems to know him better than Jisung even knows himself. Chan always takes care of Jisung, always making an effort to make sure Jisung knows he is there for him and that he always has a place to go. Jisung finds himself tearing up while looking at Chan, realizing how much he's actually fallen in love with him.

Chan looks down, feeling Jisung's eyes on him -- and he's right, Jisung is staring up at him. Chan gives Jisung a warm smile, leaning down to give him a soft kiss, "Do you like the movie, Sung?"

Jisung's heart softens as Chan's lips touch his, loving the way Chan makes him feel. Jisung nods, "I love it..." He says as he continues to gaze into Chan's beautiful brown eyes.

Chan smiles bigger, happy to see Jisung not thinking about how terrible last night and all of today was for him.

"I'm so glad to hear that, Sungie. We can watch them all night if you want to. Tonight is your night," Chan pets Jisung's hair, liking the way it feels between his fingers.

Jisung's face warms up as he feels Chan's hand going through his hair. Jisung leans up and plants another kiss onto Chan's lips, this time for longer. Jisung moves his hand up to hold the side of Chan's face, kissing him deeper.

Chan smiled wider as Jisung leaned up and kissed him, happy to have his Jisung back. Jisung loves kisses. Chan holds onto Jisung as Jisung climbs up onto him, feeling Jisung's arms wrapping around him tightly.

"I-I love you, Chan," Jisung whispers to Chan when their lips part, his eyes watering from his overwhelming wave of emotions coming over him. Jisung pressed their foreheads together again, hoping Chan can feel how much he means his words and that they get through to him.

Chan's heart drops when he hears Jisung tell him that he loves him, not knowing how to feel. Chan feels his heartbeat start to quicken, not from love, but from fear. Chan didn't want Jisung to be in love with him. He can't break Jisung's heart right now, not after what he just went through with his parents. Maybe he's confused about his emotions right now after everything, Chan thinks -- he hopes.

"I-" Chan starts, but Jisung just gets that sad, knowing look on his face that Chan hates to see.

"It's okay, Chan... I know," Is all Jisung says before he lays his head back down on Chan's chest. Jisung knew that Chan didn't feel that way about Jisung, knowing how Chan feels about love from his past, but Jisung had to let Chan know his true feelings.

Chan feels crushed that he's not able to give Jisung the true love that he deserves. He's not sure if he ever will be able to return Jisung's feelings, and it makes him hate himself sometimes.

Jisung listens to Chan's heart beating, noticing how fast it seems from and it makes him sigh. Jisung's eyes become heavy after a while, getting sleepier the longer he lays their on Chan's warm chest. He feels at home.

Chan looks down after a while, seeing that Jisung has fallen asleep. He gently and carefully runs one of his hands through Jisung's hair one last time before falling asleep, himself.

Jisung lived with Chan for the rest of high school before his dad eventually committed suicide during his senior year. Jisung ended up inheriting what little money his dad had left had and got his own apartment, hating having to mooch off of Chan for that long.

Even though he had his own apartment now, Jisung found himself always being with Chan, having gotten even more attached to him after everything that happened. Chan became his rock. He grew attached to him and they spent almost every moment together. Jisung's love for Chan only grew stronger the more time they spent together, the more they slept together, the more they depended on each other.

Of course, everything started to change when Felix came into the picture.

~ End of Flashback

**Chapter Three: Part Two**


	9. Chapter Nine

(This chapter will be quite short in comparison to the others, but it fits to make this part like that. I hope you all understand)

~ Back to Present

Chan grabs ahold of Jisung's face with both of his hands, making him look at him, "I'm sorry I told Changbin to not sell to you, Jisung, but I... I just don't want you to turn out like them," Chan's voice gets shaky as he brings up Jisung's parents. Chan sighs, "I worry about you, Sung. So much that I even tried to come see you last night. I-I knew your door would be unlocked just like you always keep it, and I wanted to make sure you were okay..."

It hurts Jisung to hear Chan worry that Jisung will turn out like his parents. He never wanted that. Jisung hates how it's begun to take over his life, almost like a dependency, just like he knew it was for his parents.

Jisung is surprised when Chan reveals that he came to Jisung's house the night before. So the figure of Chan he saw in his doorway was real?

"You came for me...?" Jisung asks, looking into the beautiful brown eyes he loves so deeply.

Chan sighs and nods, "I came, Jisung. I couldn't take it if anything happened to you when I wasn't able to help you... I'm so glad that someone was there for you," It pains Chan to say those last words, knowing how _he_ would always be the one that was there for Jisung.

Jisung smiles when Chan mentions the person that came to be with him. Minho.

"Yes. I was glad too... He came so quickly," Jisung lets out a small laugh as he thinks back to it, remembering how Minho seemed to care so much about him. He couldn't even tell him his last name if he asked, but he was there. He still came. He still cared. Jisung feels lucky to have met Minho that night at the party. He wonders what would've happened if he didn't have Minho come over last night. He wonders what would've happened if he had never met Minho and was truly alone after Chan stopped wanting him around so much.

Chan falls into their old routine when he presses his forehead against Jisung's. That was always their thing. Their thing that would make them both feel secure within each other.

Jisung smiles happily and closes his eyes when he feels Chan's forehead on his. He loved the way his skin felt touching his own. Jisung has never felt a moment when he wasn't in love with the way Chan made him feel. He worries that he will never be able to get over him, that he will always have a small lingering love and wanting for Chan. Is that how it always is with first love?

Jisung opens his eyes again and looks back at Chan, "Chan?" Jisung starts, keeping his voice quiet since he's nervous about what he's about to ask of Chan, "Could we... Have one last kiss?" Jisung's eyes shine brightly as he asks.

Chan lets out a small breath, thinking about what Jisung has just asked of him. Will one last kiss be alright? He doesn't know how good that will be for Jisung, knowing how Jisung feels for Chan. His mind is confused. Maybe it will put Jisung at peace with their departure from each other...

Chan eventually complies and slowly brings his face closer to Jisung's. Jisung is slightly surprised when Chan's face comes closer to his, closing his eyes as he falls into his and Chan's last kiss together.

Jisung moves his hands up to hold onto Chan, wanting to touch him as much as he can in this moment they share. Jisung feels a tear trail down his cheek as he kisses Chan back lovingly. He's missed his kisses so much in the time that they've been apart. He missed the way he thought they always fit perfectly into his. He must've been wrong all this time.

Chan and Jisung part from each other, Jisung taking the step back first. Jisung has a happy, yet longing smile on his face when Chan looks up at him after parting.

"Thank you, Chan. I think I've been so upset because I never got any closure...? I'm not sure. My head is full of so many thoughts and emotions that it's getting hard to decipher. My headaches haven't gone away, either, and they don't help me," Jisung wants to be open with Chan like he always is, hoping that he will still be able to understand him.

Chan nods and puts his hand on Jisung's shoulder, "I know you hate the thought, but I really think you should consider going to a therapist, Jisung. I've heard that they're able to help you with that sort of thing... Please try it out. I know you've always declined in the past, but I think it could help you, truly," Chan gives Jisung a reassuring smile.

Chan's right, Jisung _has_ always denied getting help from a therapist. He always insisted that he didn't need one and that they wouldn't work for him, but Jisung is getting to the point to where he can't handle everything alone. Maybe Chan is right. Maybe it _is_ time for Jisung to look into therapy. He would be able to finally figure out what's been going on in his mind and why he has breakdowns like he does.

Jisung sighs, "I'll think about it..."

Chan lets his hand fall back to his side, nodding, "Well, I'll see you, Jisung."

Jisung shifts his eyes when Chan drops his hand from his shoulder, starting to head back out towards the front door, "I-I'll try not to turn out like them, Chan... Really," Jisung says shakily, referring back to the comment Chan had made about him not wanting him to turn out as they had.

"I'm still not going to let Changbin sell to you, Jisung."

Jisung shakes his head and leaves Chan's house, going back to his car. He lets out a deep breath once he gets settled in the driver's seat, taking a few deep breaths before reaching up and touching his lips.

Jisung knows he has to try and move on from Chan...

But will he be able to?

**End of Chapter Three: Part Three**


	10. Chapter Ten

Jisung gets back to his house around lunchtime. He didn't think he was at Chan's that long, but time always did go fast when they were together.

Jisung sits down at his computer, starting to look up therapists in his area and he sighs. Does he really want to do this? Jisung doesn't know. Jisung is deep in thought when his phone starts to ring, pulling it out and seeing that it's Minho. He's calling him.

"Minho?" Jisung asks, wondering why he's calling him.

"Hey, Jisung. I wanted to call to check up on you, are you feeling okay?"

"I'm okay..." Jisung trails off, looking back at his computer screen with the therapist listings pulled up, "Well, I don't know. I feel really exhausted... I didn't sleep very well last night, I had woken up from a nightmare," Jisung explained, not exactly lying, just not telling the whole truth.

"You could take a nap if you didn't sleep well, Jisung. I wish you were feeling better... Do you-- Do you want me to come over after I get off work?" Minho lowers his voice a bit when he asks that, not wanting the other teachers to question if he's seeing anyone.

"I think I might do that..." Jisung takes a deep breath, Minho able to hear shifting from Jisung's side of the call. Jisung got up from his computer and he goes to lay back in his bed that he never made.

Minho chuckles, hearing Jisung laying on the bed from all the shuffling and rustling of the bed covers.

"Could you...? I'd like that a lot," Jisung smiles big as he pulls the covers up over him all the way up to his chin and he curls up.

"I'll be sure to head there as soon as I get off, Jisung," Minho smiles happily, loving to hear that Jisung wants him to come back over to see him.

"Maybe you could make me that soup again," Jisung giggles, feeling better that he's talking to Minho.

Minho hears Jisung yawn, "You're just using me for my soup-making skills aren't you, sleepy boy?"

Jisung feels his cheeks warm up from Minho's words, "No, no, of course not," Jisung plays along with him, "Maybe a little," Jisung lets out another little giggle.

"You're so cute..." Minho says quietly, checking the time on the wall clock in the teacher's lunchroom.

_12:25 PM_

"Ah, Jisung, I have to leave, my lunch ends in five minutes. I promise I'll be over soon."

Jisung yawns again, "I'll see you soon, Minho. Don't work too hard."

Minho hangs up and Jisung stares at his phone screen for a little bit before laying it on the pillow next to him. Jisung looks up at his ceiling, wondering what Minho does as a job. He realizes he doesn't know a lot about Minho, but he _wants to._

Later on, Jisung stirs awake from his nap when he hears his front door opening. Is Minho here already? Jisung didn't think he slept that long, but he turns his phone over to see that it's already _4:00 PM._

Minho peeks his head into Jisung's room and smiles brightly at him when he sees Jisung is awake already.

"How's my little Jisungie?" Minho laughs, coming over to Jisung's side, "Your hair is all over the place," Minho says as he ruffles Jisung's hair even more.

Jisung frowns and playfully pushes Minho away, "Hey, I just woke up! I bet your hair looks just as bad once you wake up too," Jisung pouts, shifting his eyes away.

Minho runs his hands through Jisung's hair and flattens it back down, "I didn't say it looked bad," Minho says quietly as he plants a kiss onto Jisung's forehead.

Jisung blushes and gets up out of bed, "You've been so flirty recently..." Jisung looks over to his computer where he still had the therapist listings up on the screen when he's pulled back to the bed.

Minho grabs ahold of Jisung's hand and pulls him back towards him, climbing onto the bed to hover over Jisung, "How did you sleep while I was gone?"

Jisung's eyes widen, not having expected Minho to pull him back down into the bed, "I... I slept really well. I don't even have a headache right now, but I don't want to jinx it. It feels so good to not be in pain."

Minho gently rubs Jisung's head and smiles happily, having had a good day and is happy to be here with Jisung before heading out to his dance club tonight.

"I'm so glad to hear that, Jisung."

Jisung reaches up and wraps his arms around Minho, pulling him down into an embrace. Jisung has noticed how happy he is to be in Minho's arms. Maybe something with Minho could work out. Jisung wants to try it. He needs to try something different for once in his life.

Minho's eyes widen as he's brought down into Jisung's arms, but he smiles. Minho holds onto Jisung tightly and they look into each other's eyes once they part.

Jisung holds onto Minho's face, gently stroking his cheek with his thumb, "How do you always look so happy, Minho?"

Minho is a bit confused about Jisung's question, "What do you mean, Jisung? I mean, I'm glad I always _look_ happy, but I want you to know that I _am_ happy. I think it's important to try and stay positive as much as I can. I believe it not only puts me in a better mood but everyone around me as well."

Jisung is amazed by Minho's words, admiring him deeply for the way he explains his feelings, "That's incredible..."

"Maybe some of it will rub off on you, Sung. Would you like to come with me tonight? I go to this dance club a few nights a week and we have dance battles and stuff like that," Minho asks, wondering if Jisung would like to see him in action. He knows he has a really cool routine with his dance partner to debut tonight and he really hopes that Jisung says agrees to go.

Jisung shifts his eyes uneasily, unsure if he should be going somewhere with a big group of people like he knows a dance club would have. Jisung nuzzles his face into Minho's arm when he has them resting on the bed on either side of Jisung's face, "So I would get to see you dance...? I'd get to see these hips in action?" Jisung says playfully, rubbing his hands down Minho's sides where he ends on Minho's hips.

Minho lowers his head to Jisung, humming as he goes right for Jisung's neck, "Mhm... You would. Will you go?" Minho's voice turns into a mumble as he begins kissing on Jisung's neck, gently nibbling every few seconds.

Jisung squirms under Minho, it tickling a little bit whenever he nibbles on his neck, "Minho~ Stop..." Jisung's playful tone turns into a groan when he feels Minho's hips grinding against his own.

Minho smirks, running his hands up under Jisung's shirt to explore his chest, "Only if you agree to come tonight," Minho whispers and then continues to nibble on Jisung's neck, slowly moving up to his earlobe.

"I'll come, I'll come," Jisung concedes, but he hopes that Minho doesn't stop what he's doing.

Minho lifts himself up from Jisung's neck to be able to look at him fully, "I'm so excited for you to see me, Jisung. I haven't had anyone to come before, really," Minho shows a smile that doesn't quite reach his eyes. He gives Jisung a soft peck on the lips before getting up off of him, "Do you mind if I use your shower? I'll be quick."

Jisung bites his lip as he sees Minho get up off of him, wishing he stayed, "I don't mind," he answers, glancing back at his desktop computer screen, "I have a few things I need to do, so it's no problem. Do you need any clothes?"

Minho shakes his head, smiling big, "Nope, I stopped by my house on the way over and got some clothing... I, uh-- even brought a few extra sets too to leave here in case something like last night happens again, is that okay?" Minho rubs the back of his head, leaning his back against the bathroom door as he looks at Jisung still on the bed.

Jisung's cheeks turn rosy as he listens to what Minho says, it caught him off guard, but he nods quickly, "Of course that's okay, Minho!" Jisung blurts out. The fact that Minho wants to leave some of his clothes over here makes Jisung feel happy, knowing that means he thinks he will be staying over more often.

Jisung gets up off of the bed and goes into his bathroom, leading Minho in, "You can use my towels," he motions towards the towel rack and continues to walk up to the shower, turning it on for him, "Sometimes the knobs can be tricky... Do you like hot showers or cold showers?"

Minho chuckles, going over to Jisung messing with the shower knobs, "Hot, of course. What crazy person likes a cold shower?"

Jisung turns his head back to look at Minho with his brow furrowed and a big frown, "I am _not_ a crazy person! They're actually really good for your skin and is supposed to lower stress levels," Jisung retorts, bringing up all the information he had learned about them, "They are superior to hot showers."

Minho can't help his smirk as he shakes his head at Jisung, "Maybe that's why your skin is so cold all the time," He says as he grabs hold of the hand that isn't on the shower knobs, gently rubbing his thumb against Jisung's hand.

Jisung continues his pouting as he turns the shower knobs so that the water will be hot for Minho, "Ugh, just take your shower," Jisung stands up, trying not to let it show how excited his body gets whenever Minho touches him. Even just holding his hand like he does, does things to Jisung's heart that he doesn't want to think too hard about.

Minho lets Jisung leave, closing the door behind him, leaving Minho alone in the bathroom. The bathroom mirror already starts to steam up from the hot water running in the shower, so Minho goes to the door and peeps his head out, "Can I leave the door cracked so the heat isn't trapped?" Minho asks with puppy dog eyes, knowing Jisung seemed to have left the bathroom annoyed.

Jisung had sat down at the computer and is startled by Minho's voice, but he nods, "Sure, sure, whatever is fine."

Minho smiles big, finding it sightly funny to see Jisung worked up. He goes back in to stand in front of the mirror after leaving the bathroom door cracked, stripping down from his clothes he had borrowed from Jisung that morning. Minho runs a hand down his own chest as he stares back at himself in the mirror as it fogs up, checking himself out.

Minho finds himself wondering if Jisung remembers how his body looks, knowing they only had been close to seeing each other naked the night they had met at the party. Minho knows he was drunk that night, but he can still remember Jisung's lean frame. Minho shakes his thoughts away as he steps into the hot shower.

Jisung sighs as he stares at the screen of therapist listings again, actually reading reviews and everything for them this time. The thoughts of 'should he do this?' start running through his mind again.

Jisung's mind zoned out for a moment and only came back when he heard the shower turn off, turning around and his eyes widen as he sees a small glimpse of Minho's body. His whole face turned red and he quickly turns away, thankful he only saw his back. He turns back to look at the computer, but water dripping down Minho's bare back won't leave his brain.

Minho comes out after he dresses himself in the clothes he brought, going up behind Jisung and wrapping his arms around him, "What you looking at, handsome?" Minho rests his head onto Jisung's shoulder.

Jisung blushes when he feels Minho's arms around him. Jisung finds himself thinking about how nice Minho smells after he showers, "I-I..." Jisung realizes what's currently up on his screen and he feels embarrassed and slightly ashamed.

Minho sees what Jisung was looking at and he gave him a squeeze when he doesn't answer, "It's okay, Jisung. This is nothing to be embarrassed about. Do you need some help choosing? I know a few therapists in our area that are pretty nice and know what they're doing."

Jisung looks up at Minho, it making his heart warm up when he hears that Minho wants to help him, "Really...? Have you been to one before?"

Minho shamelessly nods, "I have in the past, yes. This one helped me get through a lot, actually." He explains, pointing to one on the screen.

Jisung clicks on the one Minho pointed out and reads about him, deciding to write down the phone number. Maybe he will contact him. Minho said he helped him, after all.

A few hours pass and Minho and Jisung finish eating the dinner that Minho prepared with what Jisung had in his kitchen. Jisung's nerves have been rising the closer it gets to the time when Minho has to leave to go to the dance club. Everything is going to be fine, right? He's going to be with Minho. Jisung tries to reassure himself, really wanting to go for Minho. He would love to see him actually dance.

Minho rubs Jisung's head, flattening his hair down before he gives him a gentle kiss on the forehead, "Come on, Jisung. It's going to be fun," He reassures him, gazing happily into his eyes.

Jisung unsurely nods, but when his eyes meet Minho's, they soften, "Y-Yeah, it's going to be fun!" Jisung smiles, his cheeks getting rosy at the kiss Minho placed on his forehead, "Do you have a special routine you're going to be doing tonight?" He asks because of his curiosity and also to get his mind off of the kiss, even though he loves how gentle and caring Minho has always been towards him.

Minho hums excitedly, letting his hand fall to the small of Jisung's back as he leads them out the house and to his own car, helping Jisung in, "A very special one that my partner and I have prepared! It's the first night we will be performing this routine, so that's why I really wanted you to come out tonight to see it," He says as he closes the passenger door and goes back over to the driver's side to get in.

Jisung smiles even bigger at Minho's excitement over talking about his routine, seeing that sparkle in his eyes when he talks about his passion like that. This is something Jisung could get used to for sure. A feeling of warmth overtakes Jisung's chest and he feels at ease and comfortable, happy being with Minho at this time. All of his panic about going to the dance club is fading away the more Minho talks about how more low key the club is than normal ones.

The whole drive, Jisung lays his head against the glass of the passenger side window while he listens to Minho talk about dancing and sings songs that come on the radio.

When the car stops and Minho gets out of the car, Jisung stares in awe at the club as he slowly gets out, bright flashing lights are able to be seen coming from inside the club. Many people are lined up waiting to get in, but when Minho takes Jisung's hand and goes up to the bouncer, they're easily let in.

What has Jisung just gotten himself into?

**End of Chapter Ten**


	11. Chapter Eleven

Jisung stays close to Minho's side once they enter the club, now fully immersed into the club scene and the colorful flashing lights are already overwhelming for Jisung.

"I'm right here, baby," Minho leans over and whispers into Jisung's ear, keeping an arm wrapped around him as he walks them to a corner of the club that already has a few people sitting down with drinks.

Jisung takes a glance at the group of people they're headed for and is surprised when he sees Hyunjin sitting among them.

What is Hyunjin doing here?

Is Changbin here?

Jisung can't help himself from wondering if his dealer is here at the club too, even though he knows he shouldn't. Chan told Changbin not to sell to him, anyway... Jisung's body begins to itch at the thought, but he tries to push it down and keep himself in check while he's with Minho.

"Minho!" Hyunjin's eyes go wide with happiness when he sees him, "You're here! I've been looking forward to tonight all week--" His voice trails off when his eyes move to the boy Minho has his arm around, "Jisung...?"

Jisung lets out a nervous laugh as he rubs the back of his head, "Hey, Hyunjin."

"You two know each other?" Minho asks, looking back and forth between the two boys with a smile on his face.

"We went to high school together back in the day," Hyunjin says, his eyes lingering on Minho's hand on Jisung's waist.

Jisung just gets everyone he wants, doesn't he? Hyunjin thinks to himself, but he tears his eyes away. He shouldn't be thinking like that. He's with Changbin now. He's told himself for months he doesn't feel that way towards Minho anymore, but seeing him here with Jisung is rubbing him the wrong way.

"Aw, were you guys friends back then?" Minho asks, sitting down next to Hyunjin with Jisung basically sitting in his lap from the lack of room at the table they're at.

"Well..." Jisung hums, shifting his eyes as he remembers how Hyunjin would always try to get Chan's attention. Jisung asked Chan about it one day and Chan explained how Hyunjin had confessed to him before. Jisung feels a bit uncomfortable now that Hyunjin seems so close to Minho.

Is he Minho's dance partner...?

"I wouldn't say we were friends, but we weren't enemies or anything like that if that's what you're thinking," Hyunjin chuckles.

Jisung finds it surprising how much more laid back Hyunjin seems in this setting. He's only known him from how he was in high school as quite a timid boy who had a crush on his own crush. He's seen him with Changbin, of course, but only in passing when he and Chan would come over to buy drugs. Hyunjin seemed timid when he was there too, now that Jisung thinks about it.

Is this the only place Hyunjin feels comfortable?

"We liked the same guy back then," Jisung says bluntly, twiddling his thumbs in his lap.

"Yeah..." Hyunjin sighs, resting his head back after taking a drink, "He turned me down."

Hyunjin rubs his forehead while he thinks of the past. It's like it's happening all over again. God, where is Changbin? He's really missing his love right now with all these unwanted thoughts trying to invade his mind.

Hyunjin is over Minho.

He hums as he thinks about when he first met the boy, remembering how well they meshed together with their dance styles. They began to hang out more and more and started to create their own routines that they would perform here at the night club together. The more they hung out, the more Hyunjin started to look at Minho in a different light and began developing feelings for his newfound best friend. They spent so much time together and he was always so kind and thoughtful, it was easy for Hyunjin to fall for Minho.

Hyunjin coincidentally also met Changbin at the night club. Changbin came up to him after one of his and Minho's routines and things went from there... To Changbin's house to be precise in where it went.

Changbin started to become a bit possessive over Hyunjin and wouldn't like it so much when he and Minho would do a performance with more suggestive moves. It was awkward to explain the situation to Minho when Changbin wasn't even Hyunjin's boyfriend, but merely someone he would mess around with.

Changbin didn't want to settle down with Hyunjin at first, but one day he came to him and things were different. They've been together ever since and Hyunjin really did think his feelings for Minho were gone... He really did...

"Aw, who would turn you down, Jinnie?" Minho smiles and squeezes his right cheek, "Jisung, did he accept your feelings?" Minho looks up to Jisung and rubs his back.

"No. He didn't," Jisung answers, and it's true. Chan never wanted him in that way no matter how much Jisung wished he did.

Hyunjin is confused to hear that come from Jisung's mouth. Chan didn't accept Jisung's feelings? Weren't they together all that time? Hyunjin is majorly confused with the situation from his past, but he's brought back to the present when they all hear something over the loudspeaker.

**"Can we have our regulars Lee Minho and Hwang Hyunjin to the middle of the dance floor, please?"**

Many of the people in the club start to cheer and make space in the center of the floor for Minho and Hyunjin, knowing the drill since the majority of the people that come to this club know who the two dancers are.

Hyunjin stands up and Minho slides Jisung off into the spot Hyunjin was previously sitting in, "Are you ready to see our performance?" He smiles and gives Jisung a soft peck on the lips, sliding his fingers between Jisung's to hold onto his hand one last time before he has to go.

Jisung nods, getting up with Minho in anticipation to go to the center, Jisung staying back, but he stands at the front of the crowd, getting a front-row seat to their performance.

Soon after everyone has gathered around and Minho and Hyunjin are together in the now cleared out center of the dance floor, a smooth and sultry r&b song begins to play.

Hyunjin begins doing the routine they had practiced, but he can't keep his eyes from searching in the crowd for Changbin. Where is he? He promised he would come tonight... Hyunjin wants to frown, but he keeps his facial expressions as they're supposed to be through their dance.

When Hyunjin and Minho switch sides, he sees Jisung standing there and he feels a pang in his chest. He gets to have everything he wants, Hyunjin thinks to himself as he completes his movements sharply with some aggression behind them.

Minho notices Hyunjin is acting a bit differently and is slightly concerned, but he decides he will talk to him afterward.

Their big show-stopping move is coming up and he knows it's nothing too bad, otherwise, they would've stopped a long time ago. Hyunjin moves closer to Minho and Minho grabs onto his hands quickly while giving him a boost to flip in the air, landing cleanly on the floor and continuing their routine.

The crowd may think this was the shocking move, but as the song slows back down, the two boys begin to dance rather sensually with one another. Minho's hands caress down Hyunjin's face and they're supposed to push each other away by grabbing one another's shirts and pushing back like they're in a fight, but...

Jisung's eyes widen with surprise when he sees Hyunjin plant his lips onto Minho's in the middle of the performance and flinches suddenly when there's a hand placed on his shoulder. He turns his head around to see Changbin standing there and he looks livid as all hell.

Jisung assumes that _this_ move was not a part they had originally planned.

Many of the people in the crowd whistle and holler at the shocking kiss between the two dancers, but they played it off coolly and managed to finish the routine as if acting like that was an intended part of the dance.

The two boys bow and the rest of the crowd starts to party once again when the normal party music picks back up.

"What the fuck is he doing?" Changbin seethes, his eyebrows furrowed up into a much angrier expression than Jisung feels comfortable being around.

Jisung takes a deep breath, keeping himself calm as he watches Changbin go up to the two boys that are coming towards them.

"Binnie, you said you were going to be here for it," Hyunjin whines, acting like he didn't do what everyone just witnessed.

"And you said you wouldn't do those kinds of moves with _him_ anymore," Changbin says, clenching and unclenching his fists as he goes through a rollercoaster of emotion.

"I-" Hyunjin starts, but he doesn't know what to say. He doesn't know what came over him, he was just so fed up and all these past memories kept not wanting to go back down into the depths of his brain. He wants to say he didn't know what he was doing, that he didn't mean to do what he had done... But that would just be a lie. He doesn't want to tell himself and anyone else anymore lies...

"Just... Let me think, god, just let me think, okay?" Changbin says under his breath, trying to piece his words together since so much is going on in his mind right now, "Why did you do that, Hyunjin?" He finally asks.

Minho and Jisung are bystanders in this situation, Minho watching the two men fight, while Jisung is focused on Minho. He knows that Minho wasn't the one to kiss Hyunjin, but he also didn't stop or say anything after they finished the performance.

Jisung starts to wonder if Minho is going to be like Chan and it makes his body shiver with goosebumps. He already can't figure out his feelings for Chan and whether or not he will ever get over him, but since Minho came into his life, he's felt differently. Minho seemed like a breath of fresh air from what he's been used to in his life, so Jisung holds hope that this is just a misunderstanding.

"I... I was angry," Hyunjin says quietly, his hands shaking as he looks into his boyfriend's eyes, "Where were you...? And- And why are you even here?!" Hyunjin cries, turning his gaze to Jisung, "You're always there, you've always been there. Why, Jisung? I... I liked him first," Hyunjin says as his face reddens from his mixed emotions.

"Me...?" Jisung asks, not understanding what Hyunjin is saying.

Hyunjin tries to go over to Jisung angrily, but Changbin holds him back, "Jinnie..." He says softly, pulling him into his chest and wrapping his arms around him, "I was in the restroom before your performance," he explains while he rubs his back, "You did incredible as usual, but... Do you still like Minho?" Changbin asks, keeping himself calm as he asks.

Hyunjin has told Changbin about Jisung before and his whole high school life, so he knows the whole thing with Chan. Changbin knows that Jisung is someone that gets under his skin even though he never really did anything to Hyunjin, but that's why Changbin is trying to stay calm in this situation.

Changbin cares deeply for Hyunjin. He has ever since he first saw him here at the club and witnessed him dance, he was absolutely entranced by the boy. He wasn't sure what he was doing at first because he never did the whole 'relationship' thing with anyone, but Changbin knew Hyunjin was different for him. The feelings Changbin had towards Hyunjin weren't just driven by sexual desire like most of the people he's been with before, he developed an emotional connection to the boy.

Changbin is new to having a real boyfriend, so he's always been a bit over-protective of Hyunjin. In the circumstances he's found himself in now, Changbin is doing his best to try and understand what's going through Hyunjin's head.

Hyunjin's eyes start to water as he's held by his boyfriend, looking up to meet his deep brown eyes, "I-It's hard for me to get over my feelings..." He says, pain evident in his voice, "There's still part of me that feels for Chan, too... I-I'm so sorry, Changbin..." Hyunjin's voice begins to waver as he slowly breaks down, "I-I love you," He whispers to him, pressing his face into the spot between Changbin's neck and shoulder.

Changbin's heart takes a large hit when he hears those words come out of Hyunjin's lips. He cannot understand what his love is feeling. Can you still feel for others when you're with someone else...? Changbin doesn't know, but he does know he can't just leave Hyunjin like this, "I'm going to take us home, okay?" He whispers into his ears softly and then places a kiss on his forehead before he escorts him out of the night club.

While Changbin and Hyunjin were talking, Minho took Jisung's hand and led him away from the scene so they didn't have to hear anything. Minho dragged Jisung to the very back of the club and into an empty room with a small couch and table with a few unopened bottles of liquor.

Minho sits Jisung down and gently places a hand on his knee while he looks at him, "Jisung, I didn't kiss him back. I know we're not official, but I wanted you to know that I really want to see where things go with you," He says seriously, a lot of meaning behind his voice.

Jisung's cheeks heat up when he feels Minho's touch, looking up to meet his eyes, "I want to see where this goes too... I know you didn't kiss him back," Jisung says with as much confidence as he can muster, "N-Now, kiss _me_."

Minho chuckles, his heartbeat picking up speed when he hears Jisung's request, nodding slowly as he leans in, reaching his other hand up to hold onto the side of Jisung's face.

Jisung falls into place easily, meeting Minho's lips halfway and he smiles into it, loving the intoxicating taste of Minho's tongue against his own. Minho's hand slides up into Jisung's hair, pulling it in a teasing way as he nibbles on his bottom lip.

Jisung loves the way Minho's hands feel on him, needing to feel more, so he sits up, keeping their lips locked. Jisung moves so he's straddling Minho and wraps his arms around his neck while they continue to make out, gently pulling on the skin of his back to show him how much he wants him.

Minho smirks as he breaks their kiss, moving his head down to suck on the soft spot just above Jisung's collarbone. Jisung lets out a soft moan, letting his head fall back to allow Minho full access of him.

"Take me home..." Jisung says between breaths, panting softly as Minho makes his claim on him.

Minho pulls away and gives Jisung one last kiss on the lips, "Yours or mine?"

"I want to see where you live," Jisung hums, his eyes clearly full of lust, but also curiosity. He really does wonder what Minho's home looks like.

"Let's go then, Sungie," Minho smiles big and stands up, with Jisung still wrapped around him, "I'll take us home."

**End of Chapter Eleven**

**Author's Note:**

> If you like my stories, feel free to follow me on twitter @pinearah :)


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